Urban Dictionary Tees

Crafternoon: An afternoon solely devoted to the joys of craft. Mainly trophy & paper-plate based activites but encompasses a variety of art forms. The only 2 conditions are that the activity must be after midday and crafty.

snow job: An effort to deceive, overwhelm, or persuade with insincere talk, especially flattery.

mid off: a competition between two people that are both considered to be "mid" or below average.

fujoing: Often used in conjunction with the word “out.” The verb form of the noun “fujoshi,” commonly known as a female who enjoys BL comics/yaoi. “Fujoing out” is when someone who may not be a full-blown fujoshi, sees two men and immediately ships them.

Service Top: Someone who is a top in bed but likes to service the other person (mostly only doing things for the other persons pleasure ) rather then dominating them

Meme Dealer: That one person who always has memes on standby and is ready to deal the memes This person also has a lot of Dank memes This person is willing to deal the memes to anybody, even adults or teachers (if they are dealing the memes in school) I recommend getting a meme dealer that is always willing to deal the memes

orphan crushing machine: A theoretical device referenced when someone performs an act of generosity of kindness that is only possible because a horrible system has been normalized. Usually seen in "feel good" stories in the news where a child sells a collection so they can afford cancer treatment or a military veteran receives a prosthesis because of a GoFundMe.

glee debris: The mess left over from holiday celebrations. See also Christmess.

popcorn girl: When a girl goes to the cinema only to eat popcorn and nachos etc. and doesn't even care about the movie

sloper: A term used in the rock climbing community. Describing the bulbous curvaceous nature of a particular type of climbing hand hold, often considered to be at the very pinnacle of climbing holds.

Junkloom: A junkloom is a family heirloom that may have once had value, but is now considered junk. It can also be something that a friend has given you. they treasure it and consider it a great present. However, you consider it junk but are afraid to get rid of it. Nobody wants to break the homie's heart so there you are with yet another junkloom.

britbong: A british person. Used mainly as an insult.

security blanket: A security blanket is a blanket that young kids have for security. It originates from a character in the comic strip Peanuts, named Linus van Pelt who always had a security blanket with him.

Grinched: When you come home, and all of your belongings are gone, even the light bulbs.

sexit strategy: Plan to escape or extract one's self from an uncomfortable, boring, or otherwise unpleasant situation by means of bootie call, premediated date, prostitute, or other means of generally available/easily arranged coitus. Etymology of term derived from business term "exit strategy" making this term especially popular with venture capitalists, attorneys, yuppies, and anyone else who abuses business jargon.

kitchencel: An incel that copes by cooking meals for himself.

Sad beige mom: A sad beige Mom is a woman (usually millennial) who does not let her kids have color, *for the sake of an aesthetic.* There are variations of the sad beige mom, there are sad white moms and grey moms too. Basically everything in their house from clothes to furniture and walls are shades of beige (or white and grey) simply because they like the look of it. The kids are literally experiencing sensory depravation in their own homes. All for the sake of someone’s house looking like a pintrest board.

[Redacted]: This whole definition has been redacted

Goon Cave: a goon cave is a place, typically a room, in which a gooner spends their days gooning all day. A goon cave is a set up, typically consisting of a monitor or TV that is used to watch pornographic context.

IKEA Date: A IKEA Date is a type of date where you go to IKEA together and mess around. Maybe buy some stuff or grab some food if your there, just have a great time in IKEA.

himplants: 1) Solid silicone pectoral implants for men. 2) Penile implants.

Ball up top: “Ball up top” is a saying in pickup basketball that means the ball is returned to the top of the key and alerts players that the next point is starting. Often used to indicate that one is moving on.

Paleohippie: 1. An aging hipster, or veteran of the Sixties countercultural movement reaching retirement age. 2. Rainbow Family elder.

stinkfist: A song by Tool. The song is often interpreted as being about commercialism. "Not enough, I need more, nothing seems to satisfy...I dont want it, I just need it, to breathe, to feel, to know im alive." This is referring to the way people in modern society let material possessions control their mental states. "Constant over-stimulation numbs me but I would not want it any other way" is referring to the way advertisements have penetrated every last corner of our lives (constant overstimulation) however people do not care because they do indeed attach their well-being to their possessions (but I would not want it any other way). The analogy in the song is indeed about fisting. As the song progresses it gets deeper ("finger/elbow/shoulder deep inside the border line") referring to the slow, gradual transformation society has made to consumerist values. A very good song on a very good CD by a very good band.

Bird Bath: A quick shower that only involves cleaning private parts and under arms. Origin. Prison

vibecession: a significant, widespread, and prolonged downturn in support for government due to irresponsible policies and/or financial incompetence.

Resting Bitch Voice: A trait where everything someone says comes out as bitchy or sarcastic, regardless of actual intent.

Get your dick out of my wallet: A phrase used to accuse someone of economic violence against a marginalized group or the working people. Directed against corporations, the government, insurance companies, car dealerships, banks, rental agencies, and other conmen.