cowuuube Mug
Cows have a very high surface tension. Surface tension can be seen in water, in the way pond-skaters are able to skim across the surface of a body of liquid without sinking, and also in the way drops of water always tend towards spherical shape. In cows (and meat in general) the surface tension forces them to tend toward the shape of a cube. The forces at work in the cow are finely balanced, just allowing it to maintain cow-shape. However, if 2 cows should be allowed to touch each other, the surface tension will immediately force them to merge. This larger body of meat is unable to maintain its cow form against the surface tension forces now at work, and so will form a Cow Cube, or Cowube, pronounced “COWUUUUBE” with the mass of 2 cows. The seriousness of the implications of this phenomenon for the dairy industry, and the future of humanity, should not be underestimated. This Cowube, with its 2-cow mass, exerts enough gravitational force to suck in nearby cows of lower mass. As they touch the Cowube, they merge immediately with it, forming a Cowube of ever-increasing mass, exerting ever-increasing gravitational force on cows. Eventually, this vast and ever-growing cube of meat will implode under its own gravitational force, forming a singularity. This is why, as every astronomer knows, the surface of every black hole is always a cow. Centuries of conjecture over the reason for this flaw in the design of cows has recently been resolved with the discovery of the origin of the species. Rather than, as has previously been thought, a slow process of evolution, we now know that all animals were created by the Zoology Dragon. Unfortunately, we also know that the current Zoology Dragon is a bit shit. The previous Zoology Dragon, now long retired, was extremely successful, managing to populate Earth with big dinosaurs with lots of teeth. His successor has been attempting to create ever-more fearsome Terror Lizards since he took over the role, but has been almost completely unsuccessful, instead ending up with many small, furry and often defective products.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
fuck you and your mugs give me a shirt or ill shit on you
Love love love it! Customer service gave me a coupon, let me know that I had to revise the definition when too long, and overall super helpful.
Nice Mug my second Mug. A little staining or photo graphic stain on the side of the cup and shown in the picture. As a result I cannot give a 5 Star Review.
The snarky message on the mug always gets big laughs from guests so I'm now using it as my go-to bourbon glass
Love the coffee mug. Would have been nice to see who had the word accepted into Urban Dictionary printed on the bottom of the mug. As I was the one. "Dusty Dawg" Other than that I love.
fuck ur mugs i want one for free
This mug, much like a cursed relic unearthed from the depths of despair, embodies a cacophony of design flaws and manufacturing mishaps that make one wonder if it was birthed from the darkest corners of incompetence itself. From its deceptively promising exterior, which boasts a color scheme akin to a bruised banana left out in the sun for too long, to its handle that feels more like a medieval torture device designed to punish the unsuspecting hand that dares to grasp it, every aspect of this mug screams "regret." Its material, a sinister amalgamation of recycled nightmares and shattered dreams, leeches a flavor reminiscent of stale coffee mixed with the tears of disappointed souls into whatever liquid unfortunate enough to be poured within its cursed confines. The rim, jagged and uneven like the edge of a poorly forged blade, guarantees that each sip is a perilous journey fraught with the risk of lip lacerations and existential dread. And let us not forget the bottom of this vessel, where the manufacturer's logo is stamped with all the subtlety of a scarlet letter, branding the user as a victim of their own poor purchasing decisions for all eternity. Indeed, this mug serves as a stark reminder that sometimes, in the vast expanse of consumer goods, there exists a dark abyss where quality and utility fear to tread, leaving only disappointment and regret in their wake.
I think it’s funny and the quality is really good. Shipping was pretty fast too.
Arrived exactly on time( as projected) ;( beautiful blue color 💙 as specified) loving it ! ❤️
Loved the mug! It really suits me, my co-workers love it.
Pissah!
nice.
Sent this to my crush now she has a restraining order on me!!!
Without this mug, my life was but a series of painful unfortunate events. Since it has come into my life, love has followed, joy has followed and dishonour has been disavowed. Sincerely. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you. Please keep up the good work and I hope everyone will find joy as I have one day.
I love the Duh Big Red Truck so much that I have a tattoo. So does my best friend. We’re in our 60s. Woot woot!
my mom (Mia) loves the mug you made it is amazing you made her day #girlboss
I love da gooning mug. now i know how to goon and i can goon with my cool new gooner friends !
We really like our cup!!!
Just as described. Excellent packaging. Timely shipping. No problems here. Thanks!
Just wish it could have had a little more of the text on the mug, but otherwise it's great. What a clever marketing idea to be able to get this on t-shirts and mugs.
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