cowuuube custom mug

Cows have a very high surface tension. Surface tension can be seen in water, in the way pond-skaters are able to skim across the surface of a body of liquid without sinking, and also in the way drops of water always tend towards spherical shape. In cows (and meat in general) the surface tension forces them to tend toward the shape of a cube. The forces at work in the cow are finely balanced, just allowing it to maintain cow-shape. However, if 2 cows should be allowed to touch each other, the surface tension will immediately force them to merge. This larger body of meat is unable to maintain its cow form against the surface tension forces now at work, and so will form a Cow Cube, or Cowube, pronounced “COWUUUUBE” with the mass of 2 cows. The seriousness of the implications of this phenomenon for the dairy industry, and the future of humanity, should not be underestimated. This Cowube, with its 2-cow mass, exerts enough gravitational force to suck in nearby cows of lower mass. As they touch the Cowube, they merge immediately with it, forming a Cowube of ever-increasing mass, exerting ever-increasing gravitational force on cows. Eventually, this vast and ever-growing cube of meat will implode under its own gravitational force, forming a singularity. This is why, as every astronomer knows, the surface of every black hole is always a cow. Centuries of conjecture over the reason for this flaw in the design of cows has recently been resolved with the discovery of the origin of the species. Rather than, as has previously been thought, a slow process of evolution, we now know that all animals were created by the Zoology Dragon. Unfortunately, we also know that the current Zoology Dragon is a bit shit. The previous Zoology Dragon, now long retired, was extremely successful, managing to populate Earth with big dinosaurs with lots of teeth. His successor has been attempting to create ever-more fearsome Terror Lizards since he took over the role, but has been almost completely unsuccessful, instead ending up with many small, furry and often defective products.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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Customer Reviews

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Bought this for my boss and now I'm part of the unemployment statistic, cool mug tho!

Fuck N. Sep 29

Cute, simple, as advertised.

Eli S. Sep 28
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My great great great great great uncle’s dog’s daughter’s owner’s sister loved this mug. Must recomend!!!

Dhar M. Sep 26

Got this for my dog

Kolbie L. Sep 25
Customer photo from Joy B.'s review

As a Jolology major, I love my new mug!

Joy B. Sep 25
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It was for a friends 70th b-day. When we order it, it was going to come 2 day after the party. But we were so excited it came 3 days before his party. It was a big hit. Thank you.

Cindy C. Sep 24
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I gave it as a gift and the recipient loved it. No indication where it was made, so maybe USA? That would be really nice, if so.

William K. Sep 24
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I appreciated the email asking if the content was correct. Excellent quality and attention to detail. Thank you!

James H. Sep 23
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its an incredible mug! i would recommend purchasing this awesome product!

bill n. Sep 23

Damonism and #Stolen Valor Coffee Mug These coffee mugs are rugged, solid, high quality and keep the liquids hotter, longer. The definitions of both mugs are spot-on! I will definitely by more. Great work Urban Dictionary!

Forced Karma Sauce Sep 23

why is this a real thing? AND YA'LL ACTING LIKE IT'S NORMAL!?

Ako g. Sep 22

I really like the mug, but I thought I had ordered the all pink one. What came was a white with a block of pink with "Fubar" written on it.

Barbara S. Sep 22
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the only reason why i care about humanity this mug is the reason why i believe humanity deserves a second chance, even after they blaspheme my name. this mug is the greatest thing i've ever seen and i have ordered many of them. this mug replaces the holy grail. the bible should've told about the wonderful deeds of the mug and how it saved humanity from my wrath. alas, whilst the laws keep me from tampering with human minds and altering holy objects like the bible, i can only pass on my message: "spread the news and buy this mug!"

GOD Sep 21

Its.. omg, its............. AMAZING AMAZING OMG ITS SOOO GOOD

desfhueshd e. Sep 21

A mug for your boyfriend Paul????? My boyfriend is not called Paul. I don't even have a boyfriend

Yolanda Linares Sep 19

Great mug... finally got my ""your mom gay lol" mug, I'm so happy

Jackoof Sep 18

ariana grande mug omg this slays mah life

ariana grande is a queen Sep 18

It was easy to correct grammar when necessary, and then to order a great gift for a member of a wedding party. Nice, simple, and sturdy mug.

Etan N. Sep 18
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with this we regain gods trust This mug changes my views of humanity. I think we may have a chance of not going extinct. Everyone should own this fantastic mug. Oh it's also has a nice handle.

Yeet Skeet Sep 17

Love that I got an Urban Dictionary word definition from someone I know! So much fun and great memory item!! 😊

Jamie W. Sep 15
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