Swiss Army Knife Mug
As long as you bring a Swiss Army Knife with you at all times, you'd need not fear of any man, creature, extra terrestrial being, or God himself. For as soon as you unsheathe your ultra-handy multi-tool, any stranger will instantly kneel down in respect for the man you are and beg you to spare them the shame of not owning such a holy grail of a tool. The men will deliberately force their penises to be as flaccid as humanly or inhumanly possible so your scrotum will be the largest in the next 10,000 miles, even if that means their genitalia must completely wipe itself from the nearest 80 universes. The women become so aroused they leave their significant others just to serve you and write shitty sexual Twilight Saga fanfiction using your name and image as a protagonist in hopes that you will open your eyes to them. But alas, you are so manly, so alpha, that even just the slight catch of your stare will put any unprepared woman into cardiac arrest. All the children in your field of view instantly walk away from their parents and force themselves as your child in hopes that they too will be able to be as righteous, masculine, intelligent, and awesome as you someday. The parents won't even bat an eye, because they know you will raise them to overcome this world of disappointing fast food and soy boys better than they could ever dream... You aren't a true alpha male until you get one of these bad boys.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!
The description tells nothing but facts. 5 stars instant
Your description is right on, except in 1989 I named my daughter Kallen Mikel (www.kallenmikel.com/original-art). I thought I made up the name, but apparently, it originated as a boy's name in Greek and Hebrew. I first found this out in 2001 when I was traveling to Finland. In the 'tube food' section in a big Finnish supermarket there it was, a royal blue tube of salmon paste with a blonde-haired boy named Kallen! So now I have discovered that there are many Kallen's of both sexes. I want to buy her a cup, but it has 'him' on it. Is there any way you can make that a unisex description for both sexes? Just askin'. Being a Barbara (Barbs) myself ... a 'cake eater' from Edina, MN I had to ask ... haha ;-)
Thank you for the mug. It arrived fast and exceeded my expectations.
I loved my mug and it came in a timely fashion.
Gave i as a gift to my teacher she loved it
Sent this to a friend who may have originated the term, now part of slang lexicon. He was very pleased. The color is also perfect. Well done!
this mug summs up my entire life
BEST THING EVER I GOT THIS FOR MMY SON AND HE LOVED IT HE SAID THAT THE FINSTTERD GUY IS WHO HE LOVES AND IM FINE WITH THAT I HOPE HE GOT THE GIRL SOMETHING FOR VALENTINES DAY
Shipped very fast and very carefully! Perfect inside joke gift for a friend. ^_^
IT WAS AMAZING!!! BEST MUG EVERRRRR ITS A MUST BUYYYY!!! 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑
very good for lean 😾😾💪
Damn drinking lean from this hits different. In a good way ofc
As usual very quick professional seller.
ENGAGED IN AN ACT OF COPULATION WITH MY FEMALE PROGENITOR INSIDE THIS MUG 11/10 WOULD ADVISE YOU TO PURCHASE IT
I SHIT IN THIS MUG SO MANY TIMES. Very cool
I literally broke it 10 minutes after opening the package while showing it off. Now my bussy mug is held together with super glue
I use this mug for my lean. Ironic shit am I right
Hi Cool mug! Really great and mad me lol when I saw the definition! 🤣
I would eat this mug, no hesitation