Swiss Army Knife Mug
As long as you bring a Swiss Army Knife with you at all times, you'd need not fear of any man, creature, extra terrestrial being, or God himself. For as soon as you unsheathe your ultra-handy multi-tool, any stranger will instantly kneel down in respect for the man you are and beg you to spare them the shame of not owning such a holy grail of a tool. The men will deliberately force their penises to be as flaccid as humanly or inhumanly possible so your scrotum will be the largest in the next 10,000 miles, even if that means their genitalia must completely wipe itself from the nearest 80 universes. The women become so aroused they leave their significant others just to serve you and write shitty sexual Twilight Saga fanfiction using your name and image as a protagonist in hopes that you will open your eyes to them. But alas, you are so manly, so alpha, that even just the slight catch of your stare will put any unprepared woman into cardiac arrest. All the children in your field of view instantly walk away from their parents and force themselves as your child in hopes that they too will be able to be as righteous, masculine, intelligent, and awesome as you someday. The parents won't even bat an eye, because they know you will raise them to overcome this world of disappointing fast food and soy boys better than they could ever dream... You aren't a true alpha male until you get one of these bad boys.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
this mug reminds me of my cat, it does nothing and cant pour me a nice cup of joe. It is horrible, it doesn't tell nor does it allow me sip on it. It stops me from drinking from it, its like the mug is trying to torture me.
love this mug! Goes perfect with the Morbius meal.
Had no idea my name had a definition!!
Bought for an inside joke. Perfect.
i love the schizophrenia mug its amazing
This cute mug reminded me of a quote from an obscure biography I found quite by accident in a tiny hole-in-the-wall 2nd hand shop in Portland, ME in 1987: 'The Life and Times of Lazarus of Bethany'. Quote: " We are all walking wounded held together by the scars of our forbearance and the charity of our sisters and brothers." Truer words have never been said.
Love it . Its me down to a T
unlike most mug customization, you can say whatever the fuck you want. Bravo!
i liked that the mug had my name on it and a funny definition, i will definitely buy some for my friends(with their names of course).
I bought it as sort of a gag gift for my son and his new girlfriend and they loved it
I haven't even bought it, it smells nice
nice quality, vivid image
What's funny is the saying that everyone searched for is the one that popped up on the cup. So all the weird gross sayings that people are commenting on are completely out of context to everyone seeing their comment.
I would buy a morbillion of these mugs.
Coffee is good with a banana (minus the Shimflins!)
It was a good gift
AMAZING MUG. Love a good tutti cup in the morning
Great product The mug is of very good quality. Highly recommended!
Guys do i buy a sex mug?
its beautiful. I use this mug every morbing to watch my favorite movie morbius!