cia Mug
Central Intelligence Agency. While the FBI handles domestic affairs and the ATF burns people in Waco, the CIA works overseas. Their job is similar to KGB, MI6, NSA, and Mossad. But unlike Mossad, the CIA is one of the most fuckup-prone "intelligence" agency seems to be unable to handle anything without a huge fucking mess. Story # 1: Iran and the Shah The nation of Iran after world war 2 was doing fine. There was a moderate, elected president running the country. There was money. There was peace. But he was officialy a socialist according to the CIA so we went and overthrew him for a dictator called the shah. This of course pissed the Iranians off, and in the 80's the Ayatollah started a radical islamic revolution, took our embassy hostage for a year, and America's crisis in the middle east had officialy started. Story #2: The Bay of Pigs Fidel Castro is a communist. The CIA doesn't like commies in their 'hood, so the best course of action seemed to be training about 1000 Cuban boat people who fled Cuba after having supported Castro's enemy, arm them, and plan to send them over on ancient battleships dating back to 1940, with some tiny air support, and have them conquer a nation of 20 million that had mostly given Castro's revolution popular support. So one fine day, in a D-Day reenactment that would give any WW2 vet a heart attack, this imposing force stormed the beaches at this place called "Bay of Pigs." The few US airplanes supporting the assault got shot down, one of the boats sank, and the rest of the soldiers made it ashore and held out for a while before one of the worst mass surenders in us military history Following this were many attempts to kill Fidel with exploding cigars (the cigars were noticed to be strangely heavy), a poisoned scubadiving suit (did nothing at all), spear-gun him while he was swimming (the spear-gunner drowned), stab him with a poisonous pen (the guy doing this turned out to be KGB), etc. Castro has survived for 40 years since, outliving 5 US presidents and Che. Story #3: Nicaragua What do you think when you hear the word "nun?" If you're thinking "Danger, must destroy" you'd make a good CIA agent. In Nicaragua during the 80's Contras(our guys) were fighting the Sandinistas(their guys), there was an order of Nuns that went around in war-torn Sandinista villages trying to help restore something resembling order. They couldn't go to the Contra villages, you see, because the Sandinistas controlled the country. But no matter, nothing wins the hearts and minds of the people like a group of US-equipped thugs kidnapping/shooting/raping nuns. Another little episode was the murder of Bishop Oscar Romero while he was saying mass on Easter morning in the cathedral in front of his entire congregation. Story # 4: Panama The dictator of Panama, Manuel Noriega, was a CIA agent and smalltime drug dealer. Long story made short: We come after him, they kill some of us, we kill some of them, and our disgraced agent is busted. Story # 5: Operation Iraqi Freedom Without a doubt the BIGGEST fuckup since Story # 6: The Vietnam War
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
I bought a Prone mug and i love it its so good imma prone to the bathroom now brb
This mug gives my life purpose. It's what I've always said. Patience is a virtue and hard work never betrays. Ever since I was born I've been struck with one misfortune after another, but today it all paid off. I got my own mug, and I use it anywhere and whenever I can! Both of my legs are shattered because to my wife threw me in the middle of traffic and my windpipe is messed up due to me screaming all the way from the crash site to the hospital thanks to the unbearable pain I was feeling. Although even with all that's happened this is still the best day of my life. I suppose the only problem I have is that whenever I happen to look at my cup I get a little too happy. That causes problems because my life support can't handle my exhilaration, haha! I'm just kidding; that was just a little lighthearted joke of mine. I actually cannot afford life support because I spent all of my life savings on this fine piece of pottery. Not to worry though! I can get through the pain with my will and drugs - I mean medication. P.S. There are definitely no ghosts in the mugs. Just wanted to point that out in case someone was worried about that.
I bought two mugs as gifts for coworkers and they were very pleased. The print was clear and concise. Hopefully they last a long time.
Ordered a gift for a friend I hope he likes it :)
Mug was well-packed when received. Shipping was timely. The mug was as advertised. Very nice.
BEST THING EVER. CUZ YK WHAT!!?!? IT. IS. A. MUG. WITH MY NAME. AND. A COOL DESCRIPTION. ON. IT. I LOVE IT.
Just what I expected! Thank you!
I bought this friggin thing thinking my whole life would change. Guess what? It still sucks! If this friggin thing can't change my life then I don't want it!
This is a great gift to give after our Urban Dictionary inclusion
It's perfect!! Thank you!
My Name is Walter Hardwell White, My Mug was sent to 308 Negra Aroyal Lane, AQ, New Mexico and arrived on-time and I am very satisfied. My "Glock Dookie" mug is great for my lab work, and my friend Pinkman loves it!
I love this cup! My now ex-husband loves his opioids more than life itself. He would constantly pass out dead to the world the only thing I would here was his death moans. I had to call an aid car for him so many time that I can't remember plus 2 or 3 times the doctors told me that if it wasn't for me, he would have died. Her abandoned me after I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer because I was of no use to him any longer. I have no clue now who must be the one that's obligated to save his life any longer. All I know is I'm free from him now. The only thing I'm waiting for is that he finally overdoses himself & he's dead. I am buying a cup to send to him for our divorce anniversary gift so he can keep it in memory of how he treated me.
I loved it! Excellent quality!
I received the mug as a gift from a friend with whom I exchange "Weekaversary" eMails. I love the concept but am wondering why "aniversary" is spelled with only one "n?"
Wish it had the example text as well, but I loved it anyway
It’s great to be able to create your own mug.
My name is is Geet and literally this is literally a gem of a souvenir to have with me XD.
I love to put my lips on this in the morning
this mug got me hard
greatest mug ever.