Customize

Gooning Mug

Gooning is the dark side of the quest for the ultimate orgasm. Most gooners stumble upon the practice accidentally by edging for long periods while searching for the perfect porn scene or image to nut to. Extended edging sessions lead the gooner into trancelike states where they patiently open browser tab after browser tab for hours at a time, skilfully hovering at the brink of climax until the right stimulus is found. Successful gooning expeditions can lead to massive, seizure-like orgasms that leave the gooner barely conscious and bathed in the euphoric after-effects of their nut. Just as the junkie increases dosage to dangerous levels and uses harder and harder substances while chasing the ultimate high, gooners become desensitised to regular pornography and must seek increasingly depraved and disgusting content to trigger that supreme climax. This can lead to the development of paraphilias and, at worst, reliance upon illegal content. Gooners cannot function without actively fantasising about sex and can therefore be identified by their rapey gaze when seeing women in public. If you have ever edged for more than an hour with twenty or more browser windows open, you are at risk of becoming a gooner. Lay off your dick for a while and don't watch porn for a minimum of one week. This will trigger a reset and allow you to blow a load to something other than animal crush porn.

Tee Hoodie

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed

Customer Reviews

636
62
10
1
15

It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy

Evan G. Apr 23

This mug made me horny.

Quandale D. Apr 23

looks perfect!!! we loved it

Thalia A. Apr 22
βœ“ Verified Purchase

I ordered 4 of your mugs -- and have received 3; hopefully, the 4th is on its way! So far, I've received "fame," "620," and "$" ... only needing "hulo." ...It might be a matter of me being patient, that the 4th mug is on its way. However, the 3 received SO far are all EXCEPTIONAL, in every way!!! Mark Moilanen

Mark M. Apr 22
βœ“ Verified Purchase

I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better

Quandale D. Apr 21

it's the best mug of the world !!!!!

michel j. Apr 21

wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!

deez n. Apr 20

The description tells nothing but facts. 5 stars instant

Mark O. Apr 20

Your description is right on, except in 1989 I named my daughter Kallen Mikel (www.kallenmikel.com/original-art). I thought I made up the name, but apparently, it originated as a boy's name in Greek and Hebrew. I first found this out in 2001 when I was traveling to Finland. In the 'tube food' section in a big Finnish supermarket there it was, a royal blue tube of salmon paste with a blonde-haired boy named Kallen! So now I have discovered that there are many Kallen's of both sexes. I want to buy her a cup, but it has 'him' on it. Is there any way you can make that a unisex description for both sexes? Just askin'. Being a Barbara (Barbs) myself ... a 'cake eater' from Edina, MN I had to ask ... haha ;-)

Barbara H. Apr 20

Thank you for the mug. It arrived fast and exceeded my expectations.

Joanna W. Apr 19
βœ“ Verified Purchase

I loved my mug and it came in a timely fashion.

Customer Apr 19
βœ“ Verified Purchase

Gave i as a gift to my teacher she loved it

First* L. Apr 18

Sent this to a friend who may have originated the term, now part of slang lexicon. He was very pleased. The color is also perfect. Well done!

Michael H. Apr 18
βœ“ Verified Purchase

this mug summs up my entire life

TrollSoul Apr 17

BEST THING EVER I GOT THIS FOR MMY SON AND HE LOVED IT HE SAID THAT THE FINSTTERD GUY IS WHO HE LOVES AND IM FINE WITH THAT I HOPE HE GOT THE GIRL SOMETHING FOR VALENTINES DAY

Pammila G. Apr 17

Shipped very fast and very carefully! Perfect inside joke gift for a friend. ^_^

Jonny H. Apr 15
βœ“ Verified Purchase

IT WAS AMAZING!!! BEST MUG EVERRRRR ITS A MUST BUYYYY!!! πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘

C W. Apr 15

very good for lean 😾😾πŸ’ͺ

aura Apr 14

Damn drinking lean from this hits different. In a good way ofc

Nigel P. Apr 14

As usual very quick professional seller.

G. S. Apr 14
βœ“ Verified Purchase
Page 1 of 37

Also available as

πŸ€–

Shopping Assistant

Online
Hey! πŸ‘‹ I'm your shopping assistant. What are you looking for?

AI-generated responses. Verify claims.