Fort Clocks Mug
Fort Clocks is the United States' national depository of timepieces. All of the nation's important clocks, watches, sundials, etc. are held in this near impenetrable fortress located in scenic Charleston, West Virginia. Fort Clocks was deliberately not built in Kentucky like the equally important Fort Knox because Kentucky resides in a state that is split between two time zones and is thus inconvenient for a fortress tasked with maintaining the world's most important timepieces. Of the invaluable clocks contained within the cement walls of Fort Clocks include: The World's Fastest Clock, one of those melting clocks Dali used in his paintings, the atomic clock (which runs almost entirely on the cutting age technology of 'atoms'), the pocket watch that Abraham Lincoln was looking at before his unfortunate death, the new year's eve timer that sits below the ball in New York, an hour glass filled entirely with the souls of dead orphans, the world's most inaccurate sundial, and the timer used in the hit show '24'. Fort Clocks also harbors an elite military force that is responsible for maintaining the natural flow of time by assassinating anyone in research of time travel. This task force is single handedly responsible for why Einstein's "Theory" of Relativity is still just theory. Built in 1876 to mark the centennial of the signing of the declaration of independence, Fort Clocks boasts a plethora of defensive features. No one can know for sure exactly what those features are since most of Fort Clocks is underground and visitors are not permitted to be within 800 meters of the structure, but rest assured that our nation's clocks under protected with the greatest care and precision.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
FUCK YEAAAAAAAA! MUUUUGZ WOOOOOO
Happy with my purchase
amazing I will buy this. it will be my child. I WILL BE KING OF THE 0w0
I loved this mug! when i drink out of it it always has a horrible stench and honestly i dont mind because i love smelling it. my boyfriend thinks i should throw it away because he says "its has lead poisoning" but i cant get rid of it. when my mom died i bought her a mug that said "deceased" because i thought it would brighten the moment when i open presents at her funeral (it worked). but if your looking for something to buy, you should really get one of these mugs. they are cute, nerdy, and remind me of my dead mother!
Yay. I got a mug... And it has the most accurate definition of my name ever lmfao. The quality is great and it's totally worth the price. For me, at least :)
The accuracy is real! My husband and I have 3 daughters. Our last name is Staats, in UD was spot on! Unbelievable! I got it to my husband just in time for Father's Day! Lol!
love it sm, gives a clear understanding of the word every sip thankyou
I nutted in the mug. Loved it!!!!!!!!
I fucked this mug so hard, It became pregnant
Exactly as I ordered it. Shipping was perfect, got updates, accurate date of delivery, and no damage. This is a gift for my little brother.
i was put on a list for buying this mug. 10/10 would recommend
Great customer service and was a fun surprise for an inside joke to a coworker. 😊
Nice cup! Seems to be a quality piece.
This mug reminds me of when I was happy. When I was a wee little winker enjoying the wonders of this life!
The, "Wenomechainsama" Mug has amazing quality and an amazing definition! Can't belive my child's generation is so funny! Love - Sharen, 55, On facebook !<3
this mug reminds me of my cat, it does nothing and cant pour me a nice cup of joe. It is horrible, it doesn't tell nor does it allow me sip on it. It stops me from drinking from it, its like the mug is trying to torture me.
love this mug! Goes perfect with the Morbius meal.
Had no idea my name had a definition!!
Bought for an inside joke. Perfect.
i love the schizophrenia mug its amazing