Urban Dictionary Tees

critical ass: adj. The stage in fat accumulation when fabric can no longer contain the enormity of one's buttocks.

Textpectation: The anticipation one feels when waiting for a response to a text message.

mouse potato: Someone who spends all their time on the computer surfing the net or playing games. Similar to couch potato.

flirtationship: When you regularly flirt with an acquaintance or friend but do no more.

cheese and rice: This is a less offensive way of saying "Jesus Christ" It originated with the movie 'The Faculty'. In the real version, one of the characters exclaimed "Jesus Christ!" but in the edited TV version, they had it changed to "Cheese and rice!"

Empty a Leg: v. Expression used by rough older British blokes to describe taking a really big piss when they've not been to the bathroom for a while.

That's how I roll: What someone would say to insinuate that it was their style, or that it was the way they usually do things.

date shield: A female 'friend' who shows no outward interest in you, but will go all out to prevent you from hooking with other women by slagging you behind your back.

poopular: Adjective. Popular on the outside, poopy on the inside.

Good Looking: Short form of good looking out, meaning "thank you"

kickback: a get-together consisting of close friends, partying and drinking.

masterbait: a particular lure used in the sport of fishing that has a superior quality above others with its class. ie. to use such a lure

Jailbreak: The act of breaking the tether that AT&T has on your iPhone.

iPhoney: A cell phone which copies the look and features of an iPhone.

self helpless: The condition of somebody that is unable to deal with life, usually found sitting around a neglected apartment with bad hair and bad outfit.

sep: Someone Else's Problem

beerboarding: A controversial process of extracting otherwise-secret information from a friend or co-worker by getting them drunk and thereby loosening their control on their tongue.

friend girl: A woman with whom you are friendly but not in any way romantically linked.

i olo'd: Means "I only laughed once". Usually said when something isn't really that funny. Opposite of "i lol'd".

fourth of july: The day people light things on fire, and blame it on loving their country.

fakebook: Adding friends to facebook who you don't particularly like, socialize with or think you are friends with.

Dress Flops: When the new young preps have two pairs of Rainbows flip flops and one of which they concider new and clean enough for fomal occasions.

carbon guilt: The feeling of guilt for using too much carbon, e.g. too much air travel, driving to the corner shop in the car, etc

Alculate: To calculate how cost effective an alcoholic beverage is. Otherwise known as the cost per shot ratio.

ITYF: Acronym for 'I think you'll find' Because sometimes FYI just isn't irritating and smug enough.

gay crashing: (phrase): for a heterosexual to enter an LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans) event such as a Pride parade or festival. Coined by Natasha Bedingfield in an interview about Milwaukee's Pridefest in Summer of 2008, referring to gate crashing, but the interviewer heard "gate" as "gay," which was equally appropriate.

Good Push: A “Tip-of-the-Hat”, if you will, after a bystander passes gas in an egregious manner. Basically it is your vote of approval during post-flatulence that the individual did indeed go above and beyond the normal farting standards.

Frisbeetarianism: The philosophy that when you die, your soul goes up on a roof and gets stuck. (George Carlin)