Urban Dictionary Tees

pornament: noun: a pornographic Christmas ornament.

tiger's wife mad: the act of being so angry at someone that you find the item they cherish most and beat them with it.

Elf-Esteem: The feeling of being overworked, underappreciated and like you don't exist to others during the holidays while in actuality the season's success depends on you. The sense of being 3 feet small when others would view you in high stature if they realized all you do to make the holiday's happen.

Short story long: Something that could have been told in a more concise way but is dragged out because the teller doesn't know how to tell a story. It's a play on the annoying clarifier, "Long story short," people use to sum up a digression, which really never seems to be that short anyway. So instead you say the opposite.

Canadian Refrigerator: A bank or pile of snow during the colder months of winter, where food or beverage products (namely soda and beer) can be stored. Great for parties.

Wiper Beat: When the windshield wipers on your car sync up with the music on your car radio.

urban dictionary: A site where users attempt to mock and explain everyone and thing in life, under the guise of cynical quasi-intellectualism. It should be both noted and ignored, embraced and dismissed, laughed at and revered.

sorry dude: A friendly and common greeting in snowboarder language.

Face base: The point in a romantic relationship when pictures of the couple begin to appear on Facebook, and or when the relationship status changes to "In a relationship".

booty text: The lazy, low-commitment version of the booty call

photobomb: (verb)- to drop in a photo unexpectedly...to hop in a picture right before it is taken.

word receptacle: n. The person that is on the receiving side of a one way conversation.

management by driveby: When a manager comes whizzing through the cubicles to see if you need anything from him/her without stopping to listen to your answer. Way for manager to know what his/her people are doing.

Kobe Special: A large gift a man gives to his wife to appease her after he's had an affair. After sleeping with another women, Kobe Bryant bought his wife a ring that cost as much as a large house.

airplane mode: When someone cuts themselves off from the world by not logging on to Facebook or checking their cell phones. Usually occurs after a breakup or a rough work week. Derived from the cell phone setting of the same name in which incoming messages or phone calls cannot be received.

holiday pounds: The extra little bit of weight you put on during a period of being on holiday or vacation.

Thanksgiving Beard: An unintentional beard started over the 4 day Thanksgiving weekend, where you're too lazy to shave it off monday morning. Usually continues until Christmas or New Year's Day. Also known as a Holiday Beard

sacrelicious: Adj. 1) A description of a recipe that should not exist for religious reasons, but tastes good anyway. 2) Any cooking done with communion wafers.

shopaholic: a person who can't stop spending money at the mall

turkey bark: Farting after eating turkey.

Stress to Impress: Temporary anxiety caused by the need or want to show off a certain skill in front of a person or group. The skill can usually be attained unless others are watching, causing the stress.

Trailer Fraud: When a trailer misrepresents the movie it advertises. When you view the actual movie, you see the trailer has nothing to do with the narrative, characters or plot. You are a victim of trailer fraud.

moviegating: To follow any type of car for any period of time to watch the tv inside of the car

man chair: A man chair is the chair that men sit in while their partner is shopping for long periods of time. They can be found in almost any clothing or shoe store. What can we, as men do while our gf's or wives are shopping, we can sit in a man chair.

PED XING: A wealthy Chinese philanthropist who paid large sums of money in order to have his name plastered everywhere, so that people would remember who he was.

spit take: A visual gimmick used in film and on stage where a person is surprised or taken aback by another's actions or words while drinking, and spits or sputters that liquid.

expiration chug: when someone drinks milk very quickly on the day of the expiration date

darth breather: Adj. a person who breathes so loud, and sounds like Darth Vader while breathing, especially in quiet places.