Urban Dictionary Tees
Wear your words with pride
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Manager trois: When you can't figure out who your boss is but you know you're getting royally fucked.
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poo parkour: The action of climbing over or under the divider in a public restroom when you run out of toilet paper as to gain access to the toilet paper in an adjoining stall. Practitioners of poo parkour may be referred to as "shitraceurs".
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bio-illogical clock: the internal physiological mechanism responsible for causing one to wake up at workday times on the weekend. also responsible for any low-grade sleep disorders and the inability to stay awake during any meetings held after lunch.
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Netaflixia: Netaflixia; a self-diagnosed non-medical term to describe people who are addicted to the Netflix video streaming service.
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suicide by superpower: annihilation stemming from picking a fight with an utterly more powerful force.
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boytox: When a woman gives up dating / cavorting with the opposite sex for a temporary period in an attempt to enhance her overall well-being, including her mental health and her physical appearance. As a result, she may glow or look younger from lack of frowning and crying as if she had a Botox injection.
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Jizzneyland: When a city or town specifically zones an area for "adult" businesses.
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Wise beyond beers: Being able to actually remember the philosophical shit you talked about while wasted the night before.
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Banana Racist: Dislike or hatred of brown or browning bananas.
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cell phone salute: When one attempts to send or receive a text message with little or no reception by raising his or her cell phone up in the air thinking that somehow they will gain more bars.
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Patient Zero: Typically an asshole that spends between five and ten minutes talking to you before mentioning casually that he/she is sick. Causing you to wonder if you've now been infected by what this mouth breathing fuck stick has. Usually its just the common cold, but it could just as easily be ebola.
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April Reals: When something so unbelievable happens to you on April Fool's Day that no one you tell will believe you.
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Jesus: Man who was nailed to a plank for saying how nice it would be if everyone was nice to each other. Had his message misinterpreted by millions who now think it is their job to persecute certain groups of people(christians).
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window eating: The act of standing in front of a refrigerator with the door open for an over-excessive amount of time and then closing the door without taking anything. Usually done by picky eaters or one who is bored out of his/her mind.
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Link Diving: The act of clicking further and further from your original subject of research. Commonly related to the popular website Wikipedia.com
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MeDD: People who have trouble talking about anyone but themselves for any length of time. The "enough about me, what do you think of me" syndrome.
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Facebook insomnia: A condition - generally found in, but not limited to, suburban teenagers - under which, afflicted persons deprive themselves of sleep in favor of repeatedly refreshing ones Facebook 'News Feed' in hopes and/or anticipation of a new 'Status Update' or 'Wall Post' from ones friends.
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talmbout: 1. a conjuction of the words talking & about 2. refering to; asking a question 3. Yelled at broads when leaving the club to see whats poppin 4.to plot or scheme
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man points: Points that one receives upon the completion of a distinctly manly task. More often than not, intelligent points and man points are inversely proportional. Points received for doing stereotypical macho actions like starting a fight with a professional boxer, taunting someone to throw a dart at your face, lighting a fart on fire, or holding a scorching object in your hand for an extended period of time
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prexhausted: Preemptively exhausted. When you are exhausted just by thinking about something.
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blogosfear: Fear of being talked about or becoming a character in someone's blog.
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Pepperazzi: Foodie who obsessively insists on snapping photos of everything they eat and of every other dish at the table.
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lololol: Laughing Out Loud Obnoxiously Lengthily On-Line A lengthier version of LOL.
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Hipstercrite: Someone who claims not to be a hipster, mocks others for being hipsters, but is in fact themselves a hipster. This usually applies to all hipsters as it a very rare hipster indeed that will admit to being a hipster.
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on blast: to embarass someone or to make someone look stupid
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ermahgerd: used for internet memes. An obnoxious way to say "Oh, My God" with strong emphasis on the R sounds. Typically followed by other words with emphasis on the R sounds.
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Irish handcuffs: when a person is carrying an alcoholic beverage in both hands at the same time.
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Battery Battle: The comparing of two or more peoples cell phone battery charge to see which person needs the charger more. The person with the lowest battery percentage on their phone will be entitled to the charger.