Urban Dictionary Tees

Social Bully: A person who demands everyone's attendance at events and will not take "no" for an answer. Also, this person tends to discourage people from leaving social events and interrogates them as to the reason for the departure

coffee face: That ugly ass face people have in the morning before they drink their coffee.

Porn Mode: A mode available in modern web browsers that doesn't store any session information.

Jesus shoes: flip flops or sandals, must have a strap between one or more toes, can be any material but leather is prefered

Delazify: Prying one's fat ass off the couch to get shit done. Ending (temporarily or permanently) one's sedentary lifestyle & actually doing shit.

pants boner: A crease in your pants in the crotch section, which causes you to look like you're having an erection. (especially embarrassing when you are a girl)

It won't happen again: The phrase that people say to their boss when they know that they have fucked up and their boss has yelled at them at them. This is the acceptable response apart from "sorry" that should be used when apologising to a boss. The harshness of the reason can vary from being late to shredding a court case report. The result is always the same, the accused, embarrassed and flustered, the boss, pissed off, saying "it better not" and the rest of the workers staring at the accused.

coffee nap: A nap taken after someone has consumed any amount of caffeine (i.e. coffee) resulting not in sleep, but blissful rest, while still mildly conscious.

Send and run: The act of delivering bad or unpleasant news via email at the very last point in the day, so as to purposely avoid being there when the response is received. Usually deployed just after 5pm or before going away on holiday.

Congratsturbating: Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating. Coined by Jon Stewart

Sit of shame: That moment when you're sitting in your car after being pulled over by a cop. Knowing that every person driving by is looking at you.

Twerk: The rhythmic gyrating of the lower fleshy extremities in a lascivious manner with the intent to elicit sexual arousal or laughter in ones intended audience

said no one ever: An nullified attribution intended to convey the absurdity of a statement.

computer anxiety: When, after dealing with many computer viruses in the past, are afraid to download anything in fear of it being a virus, no matter how many times you're told it's safe.

Crutch phrase: An overworked figure of speech, such as, inter alia, "at the end of the day," or "it is what is," or "thinking outside the box," or "leverage our resources." Crutchphrases are a common refuge of speakers who have difficulty articulating ideas or concepts without reflexively using jargon and cliché. Often relied upon by powerpoint-user speakers who simply repeat what is already printed on the Powerpoint slide. The use of a crutchphrase is often an open admission of an unwillingness or inability to think, let alone use language effectively.

Fuck outta here: The cool way of saying "Get out?!" Or "No way!" Also a way of saying "Shut the fuck up." Like in disbelief or pure pissed offedness.

sober wasted: to feel the symtoms of intoxication while being completely sober ( sometimes caused by sleepyness)

E-void: Avoiding someone electronically such as on Facebook, e-mail, IM, or text messages.

Fapulous: 1. Orgasmic, amazing, awesome. 2. Really, really hot.

vsre: very short reply expected, ie you can answer this with "yes", "no", "sounds good" etc.

Reviral: When this generation later tells their teenage kids about the youtube videos you watched back in the day and those children subsequently rapidly share said videos with their generation.

urine echo: The sound created from urine slashing against the urinal walls

Meateatiation: The process of solving a conflict, or a number of conflicts between two or more parties through eating copious amounts of meat in front of the conflicting parties until an amicable agreement is reached.

leftfielding: adj:/ the act of contributing a comment amongst a group of friends that is completely irrelevant to the current subject matter currently discussed.

email roulette: This is when you sit with your email account open, continually refreshing the page to see if you have received any new mail. The instant that you hit the 'refresh' button and spontaneously receive a new email is the defining moment in email roulette, accompanied by a surge of adrenaline and sense of wonder/curiousity with regard to the new message.

Tubeception: The process of (often aimlessly) browsing YouTube videos via the suggested/related videos that are provided on the YouTube sidebar or at the conclusion of a viewed YouTube clip. Refers to the concept of the "dream, within a dream, within a dream" from the movie Inception; except users are experiencing a video, within a video, within a video. Can often be a great way of finding obscure and random YouTube content that usually ends up being a world away from the initial search.

trickle down theory: Theory saying that if the rich get richer they will give their surplus cash to the poor. Of course this theory assumes that the rich aren't greedy bastards that will horde all their money in banks, spend it on two million dollar trips to space which benefit no one except the Russians that take them there, or blow it all on a Super Sweet Sixteen for their retarded daughters who get pissed that their parents got them the $200,000 car instead of the $300,000.

Update Day: The one day, usually every month or so, where you finally crack, and update Adobe, Itunes, Steam, and a bunch of other crap all day. Basically renders your computer useless if you are using anything but solitaire.