Skaneateles

1. "Long Lake." 2. A small lake town in central New York where a person's intrinsic value is based solely on the amount of money in their bank account. The cops there don't have radar guns. They have pay stub scanners. Being a 5-figure wage earner in Skaneateles is actually a misdemeanor punishable by community service - which usually entails mowing every member of the PTA's lawns while they stand around and watch, sipping on martinis and talking about how much money they have. If you're caught driving a car in Skaneateles which is more than 2 years old, or has more than 25,000 miles on it, you have to pay a "Burden on the Community" fee. Apparently "old" cars bring down the property value. When the children learn good posture in Skaneateles, they don't balance books on tops of their heads. They balance them on their foreheads so as to keep their nose the proper angle in the air (approximately 89.382 degrees). They need to be prepared for when they see "poor people" (AKA: people without millions of dollars and 3 vacation homes). Skaneateles has sometimes been referred to as the "Guilded Ghetto" because the children are sheltered from the "outside world," better known as real life.