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Canada's History Mug

The most depraved sexual act in human history. During the crossing of the great Land Bridge from modern-day Siberia to Canada, man's brain was relatively undeveloped; as a result, his nerves were also undeveloped, especially involving sexual titillation. Getting a man to climax took extreme feats. Fossils have been found of a grown man having entered a woman from the vagina with most of his lower body, having pierced her left and right armpits with mammoth tusks and using that, it seems, as leverage to move in every direction inside of her. Judging by the proximity to where the fossils were found, it seems that the woman was ritualistically waterboarded as well, perhaps to make her body convulse and writhe in order to arouse the male. There is also evidence of using some sort of sticky substance, perhaps syrup, instead of lubrication, in order to add friction to the penetration. Most intriguing, however, is the recent find of what appears to be a sacrificial bowl on top of a pillar, which closely resembles the modern day Stanley Cup. Judging by the premature bones found in the bowl, it appears that, in cases of extreme inability to reach climax, the male would perform the above sexual act on an infant so that there was more control over movement. When the act was finished, the semen was harvested and implanted into a mature female using moose antlers, and the infant was nursed back to health using syrup, which was the ancient's version of Advil, KY, and Elmer's.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed

Customer Reviews

636
62
10
1
15

It morbed its way into my anus, a bit weird, but otherwise happy with my purchase

Morb i. Jun 22

After watching that anal jar video, I felt inspired. That's when I found this mug.

Billy J. Jun 22

FUCK YEAAAAAAAA! MUUUUGZ WOOOOOO

ASD Jun 21

Happy with my purchase

Jennifer S. Jun 20
✓ Verified Purchase

amazing I will buy this. it will be my child. I WILL BE KING OF THE 0w0

0w0 king Jun 20

I loved this mug! when i drink out of it it always has a horrible stench and honestly i dont mind because i love smelling it. my boyfriend thinks i should throw it away because he says "its has lead poisoning" but i cant get rid of it. when my mom died i bought her a mug that said "deceased" because i thought it would brighten the moment when i open presents at her funeral (it worked). but if your looking for something to buy, you should really get one of these mugs. they are cute, nerdy, and remind me of my dead mother!

Oliver N. Jun 19

Yay. I got a mug... And it has the most accurate definition of my name ever lmfao. The quality is great and it's totally worth the price. For me, at least :)

Zaira Z. Jun 19

The accuracy is real! My husband and I have 3 daughters. Our last name is Staats, in UD was spot on! Unbelievable! I got it to my husband just in time for Father's Day! Lol!

Verona S. Jun 19
✓ Verified Purchase

love it sm, gives a clear understanding of the word every sip thankyou

Pat P. Jun 19

I nutted in the mug. Loved it!!!!!!!!

me . Jun 18

I fucked this mug so hard, It became pregnant

Indy R. Jun 18
Review by Jansen P.

Exactly as I ordered it. Shipping was perfect, got updates, accurate date of delivery, and no damage. This is a gift for my little brother.

Jansen P. Jun 17
✓ Verified Purchase

i was put on a list for buying this mug. 10/10 would recommend

parkzer g. Jun 16

Great customer service and was a fun surprise for an inside joke to a coworker. 😊

Tera S. Jun 16
✓ Verified Purchase

Nice cup! Seems to be a quality piece.

Cynthia P. Jun 16
✓ Verified Purchase

This mug reminds me of when I was happy. When I was a wee little winker enjoying the wonders of this life!

Jzuez Jun 15

The, "Wenomechainsama" Mug has amazing quality and an amazing definition! Can't belive my child's generation is so funny! Love - Sharen, 55, On facebook !<3

Sharen K. Jun 15

this mug reminds me of my cat, it does nothing and cant pour me a nice cup of joe. It is horrible, it doesn't tell nor does it allow me sip on it. It stops me from drinking from it, its like the mug is trying to torture me.

ben m. Jun 14

love this mug! Goes perfect with the Morbius meal.

Quandale D. Jun 12
Review by Blade A.

Had no idea my name had a definition!!

Blade A. Jun 12
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