Canada's History Mug
The most depraved sexual act in human history. During the crossing of the great Land Bridge from modern-day Siberia to Canada, man's brain was relatively undeveloped; as a result, his nerves were also undeveloped, especially involving sexual titillation. Getting a man to climax took extreme feats. Fossils have been found of a grown man having entered a woman from the vagina with most of his lower body, having pierced her left and right armpits with mammoth tusks and using that, it seems, as leverage to move in every direction inside of her. Judging by the proximity to where the fossils were found, it seems that the woman was ritualistically waterboarded as well, perhaps to make her body convulse and writhe in order to arouse the male. There is also evidence of using some sort of sticky substance, perhaps syrup, instead of lubrication, in order to add friction to the penetration. Most intriguing, however, is the recent find of what appears to be a sacrificial bowl on top of a pillar, which closely resembles the modern day Stanley Cup. Judging by the premature bones found in the bowl, it appears that, in cases of extreme inability to reach climax, the male would perform the above sexual act on an infant so that there was more control over movement. When the act was finished, the semen was harvested and implanted into a mature female using moose antlers, and the infant was nursed back to health using syrup, which was the ancient's version of Advil, KY, and Elmer's.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
My nan bought this mug, took one sip and died on the spot. absolute joke.
it was day my mug had just arived i went to the door and grabed the box i closed the door AND BAM thge mug flew at me knockingme to the grouynd when on the ground the mug unzipped my pant a flew up my ass 10/10 loved it would buy
I love pooping in this mug, great experince. But if you do more than 1 pound as I do, search for a bigger one
i love men and cups so this cup was perfect for me
Amazing mug, really high quality, I love it!
fantastic, personal gift to share with anyone!
The mug arrived very packed and on time. I love how well crafted the coffee mug is. I plan on ordering other merch from URBAN Dictionary soon. Thanks.
It morbed its way into my anus, a bit weird, but otherwise happy with my purchase
After watching that anal jar video, I felt inspired. That's when I found this mug.
FUCK YEAAAAAAAA! MUUUUGZ WOOOOOO
Happy with my purchase
amazing I will buy this. it will be my child. I WILL BE KING OF THE 0w0
I loved this mug! when i drink out of it it always has a horrible stench and honestly i dont mind because i love smelling it. my boyfriend thinks i should throw it away because he says "its has lead poisoning" but i cant get rid of it. when my mom died i bought her a mug that said "deceased" because i thought it would brighten the moment when i open presents at her funeral (it worked). but if your looking for something to buy, you should really get one of these mugs. they are cute, nerdy, and remind me of my dead mother!
Yay. I got a mug... And it has the most accurate definition of my name ever lmfao. The quality is great and it's totally worth the price. For me, at least :)
The accuracy is real! My husband and I have 3 daughters. Our last name is Staats, in UD was spot on! Unbelievable! I got it to my husband just in time for Father's Day! Lol!
love it sm, gives a clear understanding of the word every sip thankyou
I nutted in the mug. Loved it!!!!!!!!
I fucked this mug so hard, It became pregnant
Exactly as I ordered it. Shipping was perfect, got updates, accurate date of delivery, and no damage. This is a gift for my little brother.
i was put on a list for buying this mug. 10/10 would recommend