Turnip Farm Mug
A Turnip Farm is a large area of farm land, usually located in the Essex area of Rainham. A Turnip Farm usually uses pre-pay horses working off the oyster network although charging an extremely high rate of £17 in order to keep the so called "ruffians" from East London away from the such restricted and isolated area. The Turnip Farms are inhabitants are referred to as "Turnips", they have to ride for miles on there horses for the local shop. Turnips are usually very lonely people although on rare occasions attract (or entice) normal people on to their "home land" which they then butcher and do their customary sheep dance around the dead corpses. In a Turnip Farm, the main attraction is always the local carpenter, in which the settlement started around, spreading out from a central location, the carpenters bush, which is believe to be inhabited from post-e7 paedophiles so a law exsts that no-one must stand with-in 20feet of that bush. The average birthday present for a 'Turnip' is old, east London bicycle wheel and for Christmas it is expected to receive a lump of charcoal, the hard the better, and therefore the more loved you are. The standard diet of 'Turnips' is oak leaves and grass although they have a delicacy of BTL (Bacon, Lettuce and Cucumber). The 'Turnips' have also been known to abandon the English language and to randomly make up there own words, spelling for them words and secret code. One positive thing about 'Turnips' is that they attract very cool east Londoners who then have to teach them the way of city life, as a right of passage.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
This mug looks great! I love it!
I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
Super Funny Mug 😂
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It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy
This mug made me horny.
looks perfect!!! we loved it
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I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better
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The description tells nothing but facts. 5 stars instant