dms

Short for: Door Migrating Syndrome This is a condition that stays dormant for most of childhood, finally manifesting on the onset of high school. There is no known cure, short of a traumatic social faux pas. However, there is debate that a cure indeed exists, the syndrome having been an integral part of the subject’s life and thus embedded too deep in his or her well being to ever be completely removed. In short, those afflicted by Door Migrating Syndrome are by and large inclined to pursue academic challenges with more vigor than the average person. So much so in fact, that the subject my lose touch with reality, mistakenly believing that they are superior to others for the fact of their studious aptitude. The type-A personality that emerges is both comical and worrisome. While the subject may flaunt their talents in a disgustingly inappropriate manner, they also engage in manipulation, and have been known to play their own friends off each other. As a result, cases of infighting among the DMS have been documented, often ending with no clear cut victor. They are both irrational and systematic. Their greatest weakness is to be found in any electronic device that may aid them in their quest for knowledge. Additionally, there exists for the average DMS a strange attraction to the sea. Whether this arises from confusion in finding the ocean to be lacking doors or an affinity for Poseidon’s pointy trident is unclear. What is known is that they go to great lengths to spend time on these salty waves of solitude. In closing, the reader will note that the DMS is not your typical nerd. They are both ambitious and benevolent creatures. Their anal attitudes are often overlooked in favor of their subtle hilarity, carnivorous cookie appetites, and ability to offer insight into life’s most trivial details.