Grandfather Clock Mug
The Grandfather Clock, also referred to as 'the Grandfather's Cock, is an intricate sexual act in which two men of roughly the same height suspend a woman of smaller stature upside down by her her ankles, swinging her back and forth onto each others erections like an erotic pendulum; the flesh hand of the world famous Grandfather Clock. With each 'swing of the clock', the woman of interest is penetrated from both the front and behind (commonly mistaken for a war on two fronts), alternating holes with each pleasurable sway. The partners in crime swinging the woman to and fro are each assigned a specific hole for their genitals to call home, depending on the directions of their erections, of course. The irony of this sexual act is that the participants will be so invested in reaching such a chronological level of ecstasy that their perception of time will fleet, and when they've finally finished, they'll realize that what felt like minutes of sensual fun was actually hours of tireless thrusting. The grandfather clock can make the best of the times out of the worst of times, but if executed improperly, it can make the best of times into an embarrassing trip to the emergency room (take it from me; I didn't know the penis could sprain until I fell victim to the grandfather clock's sensual wrath). While the clean up may be a disaster, it will have been well worth it afterwards; the benefits will come the second you do.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
Ordered a gift for a friend I hope he likes it :)
Mug was well-packed when received. Shipping was timely. The mug was as advertised. Very nice.
BEST THING EVER. CUZ YK WHAT!!?!? IT. IS. A. MUG. WITH MY NAME. AND. A COOL DESCRIPTION. ON. IT. I LOVE IT.
Just what I expected! Thank you!
I bought this friggin thing thinking my whole life would change. Guess what? It still sucks! If this friggin thing can't change my life then I don't want it!
This is a great gift to give after our Urban Dictionary inclusion
It's perfect!! Thank you!
My Name is Walter Hardwell White, My Mug was sent to 308 Negra Aroyal Lane, AQ, New Mexico and arrived on-time and I am very satisfied. My "Glock Dookie" mug is great for my lab work, and my friend Pinkman loves it!
I love this cup! My now ex-husband loves his opioids more than life itself. He would constantly pass out dead to the world the only thing I would here was his death moans. I had to call an aid car for him so many time that I can't remember plus 2 or 3 times the doctors told me that if it wasn't for me, he would have died. Her abandoned me after I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer because I was of no use to him any longer. I have no clue now who must be the one that's obligated to save his life any longer. All I know is I'm free from him now. The only thing I'm waiting for is that he finally overdoses himself & he's dead. I am buying a cup to send to him for our divorce anniversary gift so he can keep it in memory of how he treated me.
I loved it! Excellent quality!
I received the mug as a gift from a friend with whom I exchange "Weekaversary" eMails. I love the concept but am wondering why "aniversary" is spelled with only one "n?"
Wish it had the example text as well, but I loved it anyway
It’s great to be able to create your own mug.
My name is is Geet and literally this is literally a gem of a souvenir to have with me XD.
I love to put my lips on this in the morning
this mug got me hard
greatest mug ever.
I Loved The Cosmic Animates Mug. 10/10
Great cup. Thanks for personalizing the message
I did not order anything, and got a stupid cup