Urban Dictionary Hoodies

Leno Giver: When someone retires from a legendary television franchise, passes the torch to a worthy successor. Then he gets bored and starts a new show which sucks and then asks for their old job back by firing the successor.

muffin top: When a woman wears a pair of tight jeans that makes her flab spill out over the waistband, just like the top of a muffin sits over the edge of the paper case.

Seduciary Responsibility: The responsibilities of a boyfriend/husband to his girlfriend/wife to make attempts and succeed at seducing his mate.

text-hole: Someone who texts on their cellphone in really inappropriate places, like movie theatres, concerts, plays, or during sex.

professional student: Person who receives multiple degrees and keeps taking courses instead of holding a profession related to the degrees earned. Can be a compliment or an insult depending on the speaker.

guinea fridge: a refrigeration unit or freezer that resides in the garage

Towel permanence: The need or desire to use the same towel each time after showering. This may be a favorite towel with sentimental value, or the beach sized one that covers all your parts. This condition is frequently only suffered by one member of a family, causing much frustration upon finding that someone else has used "your" towel.

working hard or hardly working: Funny play on words used by successful management types. Can be combined with finger guns for the ultimate combo.

abc sex: Sex only on Anniversaries, Birthdays and Christmas

FMTPO: Abbreviation of "For me to poop on." Popularised by Triumph the Insult Comic Dog of "Late Night with Conan O'Brian" fame.

Good lenses, bad frames: Describing someone who gives a bad first impression but is actually a good person. Someone who doesn't appear to be competent, yet is extremely capable at what he/she does.

mid-day crisis: when one is in a desperate need for a siesta because they become extremely tired in the afternoon and coffee isn't cutting it any longer.

Nutflix: A movie rentals-by-mail service for squirrels

Clock Out With My Cock Out: To "call it a day" at work so you can go party.

Nearsighted Date: As opposed to a blind date, where you have no idea what the other person looks like, a nearsighted date is one where you've seen a photo or chatted via web cam before meeting in person. This can often lead to disappointment if one person or the other has supplied misleading documentation.

Happy Late Year: When people are still saying Happy New Year, even though it's already a week after the new year.

tivo timezone: A time period that lags behind real time; that is created by letting the tivo build up enough to skip commercials.

vacation amnesia: When you come back to school or work from your vacation and you can't remember what you did before your vacation.

work avalanche: When there is so much work piled on your or your desk, movement from out from under it is nearly impossible.

Guac-blocked: When you're at a party and all you really want is to get some guacamole dip and chips, but one of your fellow party-goers is drunkingly blocking your path to the guac.

Head Splinter: A painfully annoying song that gets stuck in your head, in extreme cases, impeding everyday tasks.

2KX: An abbreviation of the year 2010 from the Roman numerical system (K meaning 1000 and X meaning 10).

telecountdown : Counting down towards the new years together over the phone (cell) when physically not able to be together due to distance or circumstances.

Amazonukkah: When Christmas really lasts 8 days because the presents take longer to deliver from Amazon.com than anticipated by the purchaser. This is often caused by the reckless use of Super Saver Shipping on items which were bought on Christmas Eve. As a result, the presents are received in small amounts each day over an 8 day period, similar to Hanukkah.

YouTube Loop: When you go to watch a quick 30 second video on YouTube and regain consciousness hours later having jumped from interesting video to interesting video. Similar to a wikipedian loop or 'WikiComa'

postsantum depression: The incredible letdown some folks experience when they realize Christmas is over

christmas tight: The period of time after Christmas and New Years where the clothes you wore prior to the holidays that fit well, all of a sudden are a little tighter than they should be.

Jingle Bowels: Gastrointestinal woes following a night of holiday overindulgence