Urban Dictionary Tees

feed bankruptcy: feed bankruptcy is the result of being away from social media for so long that it is impossible to catch up on all the posts in your feed since you were last logged on.

Crosswalk Creeping: The act of slowing pulling one's car forward into the pedestrian crosswalk while parked at a red light, for the purpose of preempting a green light.

naff: British slang, describes something that is stupid, lame or unpalatable.

Eater's Remorse: The deep feeling of regret one feels after eating a large some of food, eating something unhealthy, or just eating in general.

poo pride: High esteem obtained through the sight of the length, girth, or quantity of one's poo. Poo Pride is often left unmentioned, unless one takes a photo, or pulls someone over to look into the toilet bowl to gaze upon the glory of the recently-dumped poo.

package stalking: When one constantly presses the refresh button on an online package tracking website to know up to the minute info on his or her package's delivery

Guilt Wave: The wave given by a driver who just cut in ahead of you in traffic or knowingly did something that is completely wrong on the road.

meat sweats: To consume an obsene amount of meat resulting in perfuse sweating.

condomplate: to contemplate whether or not a condom is needed in the heat of a sexual act.

wtaf: What The Actual Fuck

get an inbox: Derived from the expression "get a room." When couples constantly leave romantic, mushy or suggestive messages on each other's Facebook wall for everyone else to see, someone else may tell them to "get an inbox already" and carry on in private.

Status Reunion: When a group of friends from college or high school who haven't talked to/seen each other in a long time all comment on a mutual friend's Facebook status, usually about something they all agree on or feel strongly about.

submarine duty: Being forced to work in close quarters or cramped spaces with other people where privacy is unattainable.

Free Balding: The act of going out in public with a bald head that is normally covered by some sort of cap, hat or other head covering.

bathroom stalking: The act of lurking just outside the bathroom door when another person is using it, usually accompanied by some attention-seeking noise or behavior, ensuring that that person will acknowledge your presence and hurry up.

push pen anxiety: A psychological state characterized by one's excessive push-in push-out of his or her retractable pen; due to stress or boredom.

fuck you mean: A shortened form of "What the fuck do you mean?", largely used when the person using the phrase takes a comment in a negative way.

secondhander: Someone who gets their ideas, opinions and values exclusively form society and from others as opposed to getting: an idea from within oneself; a value from a personal rational process; an opinion from an experience.

Repuberty: The period in a male's life, typically between age of 27-39 when he succumbs to republican ideology. Signs of repuberty include listening to talk radio, unprompted remarks about social programs such as welfare, professing a love for rich people and low taxes, ranking of other people's patriotism levels.

fap on it: Masturbating before making any decision regarding females.

fatimals: a fat animal, generally a pet (fat + animals = fatimals)

Carnal Tunnel Syndrome: A tingling or numbness or a sharp, piercing pain shooting through the wrist as a direct result of engaging in pleasuring one's self while watching excessive porn.

Mental virginity: The general state of mind characterized by complete ignorance about sex and human reproduction.

collateral whiz: The 5% of a man's whiz missing the toilet, sprinkling over the toilet seat.

humblebrag: Subtly letting others now about how fantastic your life is while undercutting it with a bit of self-effacing humor or "woe is me" gloss.

debt ceiling chicken: A game where everyone in Congress refuses to agree on a deal to raise the debt ceiling until the last possible minute. It's like regular chicken, but instead of driving cars at each other, politicians are using the economy.

chiptease: When you buy a bag of chips thinking that it will be full of chips but when you open the bag it's barely full.

platonic relationship: When a woman officially declares a man to be in her 'friend zone'.