Urban Dictionary Tees

Recyclopath: n. 1) A person who militantly engages in recycling and is so hostile to simply throwing away garbage, it borders on mental illness. 2) Pejorative for an extreme environmentalist

Jeebus: Jeebus was born over 2000 years ago and started the religion of Crustianity. Jeebus Crust is the son of Gosh and part of the Holy 3-Some (or Ménage à Trois). Jeebus was born to Bloody Mary, a virgin, by a miracle of the Spirit of Truthiness. The Holy Babble gives an account of an angel visiting Bloody Mary to tell her that she was chosen to bare the Son of Gosh.

Job Creator: Euphemism for rich person.

Thanksgiving Hangover: The result of eating too much on Thanksgiving, and feeling like shit the next morning.

thanksgiving: Only in America do have a Federal holiday to remember what we are thankful for, immediately followed by the largest shopping day of the year to max out our credit cards for the next holiday, Christmas.

Youtube degree: A bachelor's level certificate that people award to themselves after they have deemed themselves to be experts in a particular field of study by watching various instructional and how-to videos on Youtube.

potato fever: A term describing when a non-white person has a sexual attraction or preference for a white person or for white people exclusively

irish goodbye: leaving the bar or anywhere for that matter, without closing niceties, like a kiss goodbye to that annoying girl or mentioning something to your friends

Rehab Sunglasses: Sunglasses worn inside.

barside manner: manner or conduct of a bartender, when waiting on customers.

hunger pack: A six pack that is only visible when you are very hungry.

Void the Warranty: To perform an activity in an extreme fashion.

aforetexted: Referring to a subject mentioned from an earlier text message.

Buddy in-law: A friend of a friend of yours. Someone you have yet to meet, but is friends with your friend. Someone you share a mutual friend with. Someone you share a mutual buddy with.

brovember: The eleventh month of the year, formerly known as November. Brovember is a month dedicated to guys doing "guy things" such as watching football, going fishing, climbing mountains, and grillin. During the month of Brovember, a man is exempt from feminine activities in order to strengthen the bonds between his bros.

Identiphobia: The fear of looking like someone else, who you know or someone else on the street. The fear of being identical in some way to some one.

Disasterbate: When, after unsuccessfully attempting to pick up at the bar (or elsewhere), one returns home to masturbate... Generally while sobbing.

Buddy Whoring: People who randomnly collect "friends" on Facebook or other social sites in which they have no idea who the hell they are.

Pillow partition: A pillow partition is a section of pillows placed between two bedmates, who are not lovers, to avoid any accidental touching while asleep. The bedmates using a pillow partition are typically heterosexual males, who are forced to sleep in the same bed on a trip for logistical reasons. If one male is straight, and the other's sexuality can be considered a bit ambiguous, the pillow partition is a necessity. It can also be used to save face to any other males on the trip who might joke about the two bedmates sleeping together.

a kim kardashian: When you have been dating for 72 days

Ring Rage: That feeling you get when your iPhone rings from someone actually "calling" you.

farting at a fan: 1) Harming one's self, usually unintentionally or without knowledge of doing so. 2) Similar to saying "you are only hurting yourself." 3) Similar to phrase "shooting yourself in the foot."

Mechanic's Arm: A mechanic's arm is what happens when you wank too much; one arm becomes more muscular than the other. Someone who lies on their back all day tightening nuts.

Cough and Call: A term used to call in sick from work.

Damn nature you scary: Expression of fear and awe at the wonderment of the animal kingdom.

bachelor sip: to drink water directly from the faucet.

Scoratorium: The purposeful avoidance of all forms of media or communication which might disclose the results of a sporting event that an individual is recording on a  device such as a digital video recorder ("DVR") for future viewing. May also require notice of such condition to friends, family and co-workers to avoid inadvertent disclosure of results by them.

Halloween: An annual excuse for girls to dress like sluts and get away with it.