Poop
Poop-lactose intolerant variant Beginning: The first hour is the easiest. You eat away with no repercussions. Your stomach starts to feel bloated. Regret sets in, but it’s far too late. Middle of the night: You wake up to pressurized air in your ass. It builds and builds and you risk it, just air. Mere seconds later, the most toxic, gut wrenching smell goes into what was your nose. One whiff strong enough to put down an elephant. The second it hits your nose, you get sent into shock. Paralyzed, you’re have to smell even more. Throughout the day: The farts smell worse and worse. A constant smell of radioactive farts. You feel the solid shit flow through your intestines. It holds back the liquid shit behind it. Its time: You feel the final solid shit reach your asshole. On the way to the bathroom, you mentally prepare yourself for hell. You sit down, bracing your mind and body. The shit comes out and liquid mixed with air shoots out after. Splattering the whole inside of the toilet. Any harder, the toilet would explode. The noises coming out your ass compete with your mouth. The shrieks you let out make your neighbors think your are being killed. After you expelled the haunted shit, you grab your toilet paper supply. You wipe, and wipe, and the toilet paper comes out no cleaner than before. After awhile, you ass is finally clean. But it’s wise to take a shower. Aftermath: You get over this traumatizing event, but deep down, you know it will happen again. :)
The Urban Dictionary Tee
Great quality and fast shipping and I just dropped my mug.
This T-shirt is a high quality product. It fits perfectly and is very comfortable as well. I'm totally satisfied with the product and recommend it to everyone. Not to sound like a commercial or anything, but I really am impressed! Check it out for yourself. If you're thinking about buying something, go ahead. I'm sure I'll be buying more for a few friends soon. Thanks guys! I love this shirt! For real.
My niece laughed and loves her custom shirt.

Not only was the product exactly what I expected, I was well informed on the shipping process in a seamless and timely manner!
The T-shirt was a birthday gift for my girlfriend and she absolutely loved it.

Happy that this tee is comfy and fits well. I wish the sentence was on the back too.
My wife absolutely loves her new T-shirt.
This looks like a weird design but it looks cool
This T shirt is the best piece of material to have ever graced this Earth. The fine quality fabrics and in depth definition, which is professionally implanted on the back of the shirt, which makes for some very interesting talking points. Thank you Pablo Parmesan.
Absolutely wonderful product! I bought this shirt for my son and he gagged with joy! Mariah Careystmas everyone!
I love it I bought me and my family some
Glad I had utmost FREEDOM OF SPEECH to express in articulate detail what evv it is the fk i was on a rant about that day. I haven't even received my shirt. I just a few moments ago placed the order. That is how pleased 😄 I am. Fk yeah fk yeah. Very empowering experience. My thoughts turned into type, that made some shi# happen. Having freedom of expression was most definitely...one fk ton of fun. A fk ton can be quantified as exuberance an joy beyond expectation. Fk yeah fk yeah. Awesome>>>
Proofread much? She might seem "quite"? Please fix the spelling to "quiet". Can't believe I was considering this purchase...
Damonism T-shirt :+) I found this by accident while surfing through your site. I love this shirt. I bought one and wear it when I feel frisky.
Another hit!
Great shirt, great service. A big thumbs up👍🏻
I always get so many compliments when I wear this (my favorite) shirt. I have been able to give out my phone number to lots of nice old men and my parents think it's great that I have so many nice mentors grooming me into a nice young boy who is willing to "follow the rules ".
Very comfortable and love the tyoeface
Very nice t-shirt. Fits perfect.
FUCK you urban dictionary.
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |