packer

A private school located in Brooklyn Heights (Brooklyn New York) for grades K-12 as well as a preschool for toddlers. Originally founded in 1845, the building is an old church with a recently added section for the Middle School (Grades 5-8). Both buildings are mad old, but the newer addition was redesigned so that expensive-ass glass plates now line the jagged steel wall of the hallways. The colors are Maroon and White and it's mascot is a Pelican. Packer is a laptop school and starting in 5th grade every student has an Apple iBook. These are replaced with Dells in 9th grade when the students enter the Upper School. These laptops may appear to be a smart move, but are in fact retarded. They weight a shitload and don't help at all. The class sizes at packer are extremely small. There are only about 60 kids in each grade, though that number increases to about 100 in the Upper School. These small numbers make it so that everyone in every grade knows each other fairly well. Packer prides itself on its close-knit community, but unfortunate side-effects include the extreme impossibility of a Packer kid ever being friends with an outsider. One of Packer's main goals as a school is to prevent this from happening. To do so, they make sure none of their vacations overlap with those of public schools. Packer claims to be diverse, this a laughable fallacy. There are about three to five minority students per grade. The pictures on the school's website are known to mainly contain the same three or non-white kids. The sad thing is, packer is actually fooling people. Many of these "minorities" have been bleached or whitewashed. These bleached students have double benefits to the school. For one thing, they allow the school to call itself diverse while actually being homogenous. Secondly, the white students are made to feel as if they aren't really the racist bastards they are. It allows them to say, "Hey, I'm friends with a black kid! Now I can go into the world with an open mind!" Packer kids are also known to bring up their "black" or "hispanic" friends frequently in conversation, always eager to prove that they are not racist. When in actuality, these kids are completely unprepared for black kids who act black. However, there are no shortage of kids at packer who act black. Packer has been proven to contain the most wiggers per square foot in all of Brooklyn. Ironically, these kids are often the most sheltered and ignorant of the bunch. As one might guess, they are also very taken with the prospect of having a black or hispanic friend and thus flock to these kids like flies to honey. This only makes the wiggers less aware of their whiteness. None of them have ever been to a ghetto, except driving around the outskirts of one in their brand new Mercedes with their retired parents. Packer has been known to call itself the Cocaine School because it likes to feel gangsta. In reality, everyone is sheltered and only a few kids do anything more than dabble in the psychoactive.