Jersey Contractor Tee
noun A classic New Jersey species of “businessman” commonly spotted in a lifted, overpriced pickup truck (usually a Ram, F-250, or Silverado) covered in magnetic signs for his “construction company” that changes names every six months. The Jersey Contractor has never swung a hammer, touched a saw, or broken a sweat in his life. His entire operation consists of driving around all day, yelling into a Bluetooth headset, while outsourcing 100% of the actual work to undocumented immigrants or day laborers he pays under the table. If one of his workers calls out sick, he panics and recruits his buddy from the bar, compensating him with two slices of pizza and a warm cup of water from the hose. Typically a Gen X or millennial dude rocking a backward hat, gold chain, and a perpetual Red Bull/Monster Energy addiction. His weekends involve copious amounts of beer, buffalo wings, and cocaine at the local nightclub where he tells everyone he “built half of Jersey.” Known for: • Evading taxes like it’s an Olympic sport • Ignoring every zoning law on the books • Starting jobs with a bang and ghosting halfway through • Acting like he personally laid every brick while he was really just counting cash in the truck • Exploiting labor while complaining that “nobody wants to work anymore”
The Urban Dictionary Tee
Customer Reviews
Love this shirt so much
I love this t-shirt that says morbussy. It allows me to show off both my love for Morbius and the fact that I get no Morbussy.
This shirt feels great, perfect fit too.
Great looking t-shirt. Good quality. Printing looks good.
Cool I didn’t order anything I just have a lot of free time and not a lot of hobbies
Fun and soft.
Good stuff! Although, I do have a sneaking suspicion that this is cursed. You see, whenever i dawn this top-teir, soft, stylish shirt - I proceed to pass out within 46 seconds. The mere act of making contact with the material insues the process of this countdown starting. If I do not quit contact, i will lose conciousness the exact moment the countown hits 0. And when I regain clarity, I find myself in a bathtub - never mine, but a bathtub nevertheless. In the bathtub, there is always various colours of hairdye. I then have to go back home, shirt stained with dye. Very fashionable though! 10/10
Smooth transaction and nice product, shipping was quick!
good very good worth money!
5 out of 5 I love when people start reading the definition. It's halourious
10/10 yes much good 10/10 would buy again
Fit is true to size, good quality material. Graphics applied well (not off-center or angled as with some products). Quick shipment.
gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made
Got it for a friend! He loved it
Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.
mine says "ass" on it lol
Good Decent, comfortable by all means
My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day
shirt made me cum
Dick Aww man I love this shirt for eating