fettuccine alfredo
As originated by the Italians in the 17th century, fettuccine alfredo was originally known of as a simple pasta dish containing long stringy noodles and cheesy sauce. It was not known until recent times that the special ingrediant that gave this delicacy its distinct taste was actually human semen inserted by the overworked servents of the Italian people. This tradition has continued throughout the ages, and strongly today. It was not until the 20th century that this idea has been brought into the bedroom and under the sheets as a recreational sex act that has a little extra spice of its own. To perfrom this ridiculously arousing and scrumptious stunt one must boil noodles and alfredo sauce in pots until perfectly "al dente" next, the male must bring the boiling hot pot and however many desired bowls and eating utensils into the bedroom and dump the contents steaming hot water and all, into the females vaginal crevices or male/female anal cavity possibly causing 1st-3rd degree burns on the inside of the chosen arena. After this is complete, one must bring alfredo sauce and also insert that into the opening of choice. Next, one must perform sexual intercorse until the point of climax, then ejaculate all over the zesty creation containg noodles, vaginal fluid, alfredo sauce and more. once the ejaculation is complete and the penis is limp. open the vaginal/anal lips and dump the contents into the bowls, grab a fork and enojy!
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |