Doug Funnie

A fantastic life changing cartoon that was aired on Nickelodeon during the 90s. It was later purchased by the Disney Corporation and went completely downhill thereafter. The show "Doug" marks the trials and tribulations of a ten-haired, big nosed, green vest wearing, 11 year old boy with a humouous middle name (Yancey). Douglas Yancey Funnie (his full name) lives in a town called Bluffington with his family and faithful dog named none other than Porkchop. One of Doug's favorite activities includes writing in his journal and hanging out at the Honkerburger with his best friend Mosquito "Skeeter" Valentine. Skeeter is an odd creature at best. At first glance, he is a blue colored semi-retarded suburban child who can make an unlimited amount of odd sounds. His trademark sound being a "honk honk" noise, if you will. However, in one episode we learn that Skeeter is in fact a certified genius. Doug and Skeeter, as well as almost every child in Bluffington, are madly in love with the famous rock group called The Beets. The Beets are responsible for such decade defining hits as "I need more allowance", "Killer Tofu", "Shout your lungs out", and "Where's my sock?". Doug was indeed a brilliant show that was way beyond it's time. It defined my childhood as well as millions of other childrens'. Doug's Nickelodeon years were the happiest times of his life. He never grew up, always wore shorts, and inched ever so close to finally winning the heart of his mulatto love interest, Patti Mayonnaise. However, once Doug moved on over to Disney, he changed drastically. His personality was completely altered, not to mention he changed his clothes quite often. This move was a shock and a horrible mistake. The only proper thing to do now is to kill Doug off for he has been tainted by the poison tentacles of the Disney Corporation.