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ballooning Tee

A very intense, surprising sexual act to be engaged in by one partner equipped with a penis (surprisee) and another partner equipped with at least one non-oral cavity (surpriser). Useful for lazy Sundays, (and/or on sleeping partners who do not see the act coming pause... phrasing that have given prior consent to such acts), this act forgoes foreplay for forceful fornication, foreshadowing formidable forays forevermore. To engage in ballooning, the surpriser discretely acquires a penis (attached to the surprisee) at maximum flaccidity and proceeds to pack the penis, in whatever manner necessary, into the orifice, then allowing the surprisee (and their penis) to awaken from within surpriser's non-oral cavity. The packing process may include, but is not limited to, folding, scrunching, rolling, shoving, tucking, vacuuming, and/or fingering. For maximum efficiency while initiating ballooning, the following criteria is ideal: a loose non-oral cavity, a small member (preferably growers, not showers), a quantity of slippy juice that walks the line between ease of entry and undesired arousal of the surprisee's penis prior to the act of engorgement. Note: the surpriser may be aroused before, during, and after the events of ballooning- arousal is recommended to further enhance the ballooning experience. If the penis ever engorges beyond 15% erect before entry into the non-oral cavity, ballooning is no longer the correct term for said act. See surprise sex.

Mug Hoodie

The Urban Dictionary Tee

Soft, comfortable fabric
Printed on-demand just for you
True to size fit
Pre-shrunk (won't shrink in wash)
Tear-away label (no itchy tags)
Every order personally reviewed

Customer Reviews

71
8
1
0
3

Cool I didn’t order anything I just have a lot of free time and not a lot of hobbies

Hi May 31

Fun and soft.

Donald G. May 21
✓ Verified Purchase

Good stuff! Although, I do have a sneaking suspicion that this is cursed. You see, whenever i dawn this top-teir, soft, stylish shirt - I proceed to pass out within 46 seconds. The mere act of making contact with the material insues the process of this countdown starting. If I do not quit contact, i will lose conciousness the exact moment the countown hits 0. And when I regain clarity, I find myself in a bathtub - never mine, but a bathtub nevertheless. In the bathtub, there is always various colours of hairdye. I then have to go back home, shirt stained with dye. Very fashionable though! 10/10

Ally B. May 20

Smooth transaction and nice product, shipping was quick!

M U. May 16
✓ Verified Purchase

good very good worth money!

me May 9

5 out of 5 I love when people start reading the definition. It's halourious

Ayoush smith May 7

10/10 yes much good 10/10 would buy again

Some dude May 1

Fit is true to size, good quality material. Graphics applied well (not off-center or angled as with some products). Quick shipment.

Vince B. Apr 28
✓ Verified Purchase

gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made

the gooderesting Apr 26

Got it for a friend! He loved it

Roger M. Apr 20
✓ Verified Purchase

Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.

Phoenix S. Apr 18
✓ Verified Purchase

mine says "ass" on it lol

me Apr 13

Good Decent, comfortable by all means

Juliana Apr 6

My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day

Vern B. Apr 1
✓ Verified Purchase

shirt made me cum

helga s. Mar 31

Dick Aww man I love this shirt for eating

Gayagay Mar 27

people shat on my shirt that said shart and im mad they took a shit on it instead of a shart

Michael W. Mar 26

Necero's shirt i can use this in almost every phrase. This shirt allows me to do some great stuff with my kids and grandkids! i'd love for anyone who says same to get this shirt!

William Mar 19

Bad! Why is this T-shirt named shitty fucking??What a bad name it is!Recommend?Never!😡

💆🏻‍♀️琴 Mar 8

The shirts are amazing! I will be ordering again. And recommend them to others 🙂

Rhiannon K. Mar 6
✓ Verified Purchase
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