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American Pounding

A.K.A. Patriot Act 1. A sex act between a man and a woman, which consists in hanging the woman to the ceiling using leather straps for the legs, engaging in rough coitus, beating the woman's rear end blue, letting go off the straps and finishing on her buttocks. Her strap marks represent the stripes, the buttocks the square and the splooge the stars of the flag of the land of freedom, hence the very appropriate name. Note: The most ideal way to do it is to use exactly thirteen straps, commit the act against the partner's will and/or knowledge, and do it publicly, to brashly deny it afterwards. The woman, or passive partner, also has to be as light-skinned as possible. At least four variations of this popular sex technique also exist: The Liberal: Giving the passive role to a man, the penetrative role to a woman, or both. Bonus points if it's also interracial. The Conservative: Shooting down the passive partner and burying the evidence. Bonus points if everything takes place in the cheapest Roadside Motel avaliable and no condoms are used. Raising the Flag: Just as the act is finished, stick a pole no less long than a broomstick on the passive partner's mouth. Actually raising the flagpole high above and saluting a possibly inexistant crowd is optional. Overdoing it may however turn the whole thing into a conservative, so be careful. The Veteran's Day Homage: Giving your girlfriend/wife to a real veteran for the purpose of this act.

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The Urban Dictionary Tee

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used it as a cum rag

Jacob H.Dec 31

Great fit and soft material. Gave as gift. Big hit!

Joyce v.Dec 27
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Great conversation piece! Plus I can never find anything with my name on it. This was a great find! Will definitely order more!!!!

RUTH C.Dec 23
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Got exactly what I wanted.

Issac H.Dec 23
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Exactly what I expected, thanks!

Alison B.Dec 23
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I don't visit Urban Dictionary alit so I only recently saw they offered merch. I immediately started looking up words for potential Christmas gifts. Found the ideal gift for my brother & ordered a shirt. It arrived very quickly and I love it. It's exactly as pictured on the site and being able to customize it with his name makes it perfect. I only hope he loves it as much as I do. Will definitely keep Urban Dictionary in mind when I need to find a great gift.

Jacqueline H.Dec 20
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i love my shirt i made it say sapnap cause yassssssssss

Ophelia M.Dec 19

Best This is the best shirt I have ever gotten I love it and I definitly recomend it to any friend named Hailie

JimiTheKiwiDec 17

So cool to quickly be able to turn a trending phrase into wearable art!

Clint N.Dec 17
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it was really good i put dad with the def of tfu and lol

Megan W.Dec 15

*clap* *clap* MEME REVIEW. this is so amazing, alexa play despacito 9001

Bailey DoddDec 6

Love this shirt. Got it for my brother for Christmas and I can’t wait for his reaction! Ordered size L and it seems maybe a little big? Thank you!

Ellen S.Dec 3
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thankyou for all your kind reviews. For everyone complaining about the spelling we was high on the bezamine while writing it so fuck youuuuuu

joel f.Nov 28

I love it

Richard C.Nov 21

I really love it it's me through and through. Thank you. And when I want another shirt made I will be going through you guys.

kimberly m.Nov 18
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ThIs is perfect

Leart M.Nov 16

Great quality and fast shipping and I just dropped my mug.

Andstubbedmytoe D.Nov 12

This T-shirt is a high quality product. It fits perfectly and is very comfortable as well. I'm totally satisfied with the product and recommend it to everyone. Not to sound like a commercial or anything, but I really am impressed! Check it out for yourself. If you're thinking about buying something, go ahead. I'm sure I'll be buying more for a few friends soon. Thanks guys! I love this shirt! For real.

Zachary L.Nov 10
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My niece laughed and loves her custom shirt.

Jorge A.Nov 10
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Review by Gabe L.

Not only was the product exactly what I expected, I was well informed on the shipping process in a seamless and timely manner!

Gabe L.Nov 8
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SizeLengthWidth
XS27"16½"
S28"18"
M29"20"
L30"22"
XL31"24"
2XL32"26"
3XL33"28"
SizeLengthWidth
XS69 cm42 cm
S71 cm46 cm
M74 cm51 cm
L76 cm56 cm
XL79 cm61 cm
2XL81 cm66 cm
3XL84 cm71 cm

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