Townies

Townies are, to put it simply - Sheep. The follow whatever trends are in fashion, for about 3 weeks, then go onto the next thing, they are very noticeable: The males wear dodgy cheap tracksuits and sports clothes, usually bought from JJB. They wear baseball caps with the peaks pointing straight up, and they usually have their trouser legs tucked into their socks, perhaps for some sort of primitive enjoyment. The Female townies wear tops that- well I should say tops, but really they wear a piece of fabric that barely covers their nipples! They can usually be seen showing off to the males by removing their bra without taking their shirts off - which to me seems very pointless. Townies usually listen to music by slutty women who don't have real talent but wear revealing clothes so the males stay interested and the females take notes on how to dress wrongly. They also listen to music by so-called "gangstaz" - men who would be shot within a second if they actually put one foot in the ghetto. The music is usually about drugs, sex and alcohol, as those seem to be the only things that stimulate the small townie mind. As far as personality goes, townies are practially the same. They will all tell you that they lost their virginity at the age of 11 or 12 or some other stupid age, when in actual fact they have never seen the opposite sex's genitalia anywhere other than porn and sex-ed videos! They will all sit on street corners, drinking cheap beer that they coaxed the older townies into buying for them, and smoking 10-20 cigarettes a day. These activites make townies think they are really "cool" and probably give them the feeling that they are grown-ups, when in actual fact they are just immature slobs. They will mess around in school, disrupting lessons, etc, which reflects on their school achievements - which are usually nothing but sports-related activities. If you are not one of them and you approcach a group of townies, don't be alarmed if they shout abuse at you and offer to fight you. The lead townie will shout the most abuse, whilst slowly backing away to hide behind the larger, quieter ones. If this happens, just keep walking - most of the time they will keep shotuing "come on then if you're startin'!" whilst still not coming any closer to you.