Modesto

Ahh, Modesto, California. No one's heard of this town, but 200,000 people call it home. It's the central valley, so it's not exactly what you'd see on the OC. No beaches, just miles and miles of farmland mixed with suburban hell and urban sprawl. That's not to say we don't have bragging rights. We've got just about everything you need to live: taco trucks, generally hot women (more prevalent in east Modesto, however), lots of fastfood, bad air pollution... well you get the idea. We've got a music scene, and there are some pretty good local bands and venues. Our downtown comes alive at night, and it's somewhat of a haven for nightlife (and cops). We've got the stoners, emo children, thugs, indie kids, jocks, and preps. Del rio is where the rich kids live. And you always seem to have at least one friend who lives on a ranch in the boonies, which results in random bonfires where teens go to consume lots of keystone while huddling around a fire. Too bad the cops here love to go on the party patrol, which makes for hectic weekends and plenty of stories about run-ins with the local 5-0. 99 runs through the heart of modesto. Further to the east, McHenry Avenue separates east Modesto from west. East modesto is where all the new housing developments are. They're served by Beyer, Enochs, and Johansen high schools. There is also Modesto, Davis, and Downey high schools. If you are bored, go downtown and watch a movie at Brenden theatres. It's more or less the default thing to do on a Saturday night if you are bored, or if you are a pre-teen. Too bad Brenden is plagued with emos and thugs. If you're a reasonably popular teenager, the norm is to go to a high school party, loaded with plenty of valley girls, sometimes resulting in promiscuity or shameful hookups. MJC, our local community college, boasts admirable transfer rates, but it often becomes a hellhole for the lazy. Cruising is an important coming-of-age activity in Modesto, yet the cops here love to bust people for anything, even setting up roadblocks and sobriety checkpoints occasionally.