Ashford Mug
Also known to the residents by its alternate names "Gashford" and "Trashford" due to the large amount of single mothers, is a relatively large town located in the Kent in the South-East of England where everyone is so damn miserable their soulless eyes can pierce sheet steel. It is home to Stanhope, the town's obligatory zoo of pikeys that recently had a regeneration which was the equivalent of polishing a turd. The buses often get infested with old people in the mornings and the ghurkas live up to their stereotype by constantly smelling of curry. The gypsies leave litter wherever they go and it became such a problem that the places they frequented had trenches dug or boulders placed to stop them from using them. Main attractions include but are not limited to: *A high street which features 5 barber shops, 5 pubs, a titty bar, 4 discount stores and 3 card shops, while the rest of them are primarily restaurants; fast food or otherwise. *A bowling alley *A decomissioned tank used as a statue *A Designer Outlet shaped like a vagina; popular tourist destination and the primary cause of sidewalk rage *Frequent car crashes coming out of ASDA *A skate park for horny teenagers and young adults to pick up horny teenagers *An out of the way Cineworld *Prams and screaming children everywhere *And an international train station so you can escape the monumental dullness of it all for the day which is often left unattended after 6pm; free train rides if you don't get caught.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
This mug looks great! I love it!
I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
Super Funny Mug 😂
best mug ever spittin nothin but fax
i fucking hate your mugs and shirts
awesome product!
This mug made me to from a Level 1 Crook to Level 100 Mafia Boss instantly. I ascended to the heavens above when it came to the door and God himself told me "your a boss now cuh" and i descended feeling very powerful. Next thing I knew everyone loved me. However 4/5 stars because now I have too many fans and one is holding me hostage.... help
The mug is awesome, the yellow color is great but green is also good, the scream mug is the best mug in my entyre live!!! I can't imagine my life without this mug, i cant stop buing it.... I have like 30 mugs every color in this site and also i'm ordered a new one, please help me.
It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy
This mug made me horny.
looks perfect!!! we loved it
I ordered 4 of your mugs -- and have received 3; hopefully, the 4th is on its way! So far, I've received "fame," "620," and "$" ... only needing "hulo." ...It might be a matter of me being patient, that the 4th mug is on its way. However, the 3 received SO far are all EXCEPTIONAL, in every way!!! Mark Moilanen
I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better
it's the best mug of the world !!!!!
wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!
The description tells nothing but facts. 5 stars instant