Customize

Old Fuckboy Tee

A 40+ year old man who still acts like a young fuckboy. The old fuckboy has an ex-wife (or two) who he refers to as a "pyscho." This may be true. What is also true is that the ex-wife of the old fuckboy is just a woman who spent years dealing with relentless narcissism, emotional manipulation and cheating, and now believes that the old fuckboy is evil and must be exterminated. The old fuck boy, having had decades of practice, is adept at gaslighting. Emotionally, he is a 7 year old. He is incapable of having adult conversations about relationships, yet insists he's the best, most affectionate boyfriend. The old fuckboy having spent his 20s and 30s being a born-again asshole, and despite having gone to college, probably has a bullshit job, the income of which goes to child support. He will therefore constantly ask you for money. The old fuckboy can sniff out when you have had enough of his bullshit and will act like a decent human being for 60 seconds in order to stay in your good graces. Worst of all, not only can the old fuckboy make you come like gangbusters Every Single Time, he is aware of the relationship between sex and oxytocin, and makes sure he fucks you regularly enough so the feelings of love/trust felt during sex don't dissipate, also known as dickmatizing or dickmatization. Do not make the mistake of thinking you can remain in control and use the old fuckboy for sex. He's a wily old fart and will find a way to turn the tables so that he's using you.

Mug Hoodie

The Urban Dictionary Tee

Soft, comfortable fabric
Printed on-demand just for you
True to size fit
Pre-shrunk (won't shrink in wash)
Tear-away label (no itchy tags)
Every order personally reviewed

Customer Reviews

71
8
1
0
3
Review by Fred F.

Feels great love the shitt

Fred F. Jul 3
✓ Verified Purchase

Great shirt. Great service. Shopify doesn’t track the shipment accurately though. However, when I reached out to Urban Dictionary customer service, they were able to help me.

Smitha M. Jul 3
✓ Verified Purchase

Wore it to school.

Monica L. Jun 28

Love this shirt so much

Joey L. Jun 16
✓ Verified Purchase
Review by No M.

I love this t-shirt that says morbussy. It allows me to show off both my love for Morbius and the fact that I get no Morbussy.

No M. Jun 15

This shirt feels great, perfect fit too.

Tyler S. Jun 6
✓ Verified Purchase

Great looking t-shirt. Good quality. Printing looks good.

Jane B. Jun 3
✓ Verified Purchase

Cool I didn’t order anything I just have a lot of free time and not a lot of hobbies

Hi May 31

Fun and soft.

Donald G. May 21
✓ Verified Purchase

Good stuff! Although, I do have a sneaking suspicion that this is cursed. You see, whenever i dawn this top-teir, soft, stylish shirt - I proceed to pass out within 46 seconds. The mere act of making contact with the material insues the process of this countdown starting. If I do not quit contact, i will lose conciousness the exact moment the countown hits 0. And when I regain clarity, I find myself in a bathtub - never mine, but a bathtub nevertheless. In the bathtub, there is always various colours of hairdye. I then have to go back home, shirt stained with dye. Very fashionable though! 10/10

Ally B. May 20

Smooth transaction and nice product, shipping was quick!

M U. May 16
✓ Verified Purchase

good very good worth money!

me May 9

5 out of 5 I love when people start reading the definition. It's halourious

Ayoush smith May 7

10/10 yes much good 10/10 would buy again

Some dude May 1

Fit is true to size, good quality material. Graphics applied well (not off-center or angled as with some products). Quick shipment.

Vince B. Apr 28
✓ Verified Purchase

gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made

the gooderesting Apr 26

Got it for a friend! He loved it

Roger M. Apr 20
✓ Verified Purchase

Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.

Phoenix S. Apr 18
✓ Verified Purchase

mine says "ass" on it lol

me Apr 13

Good Decent, comfortable by all means

Juliana Apr 6
Page 1 of 5

Also available as

🤖

Shopping Assistant

Online
Hey! 👋 I'm your shopping assistant. What are you looking for?

AI-generated responses. Verify claims.