Old Fuckboy
A 40+ year old man who still acts like a young fuckboy. The old fuckboy has an ex-wife (or two) who he refers to as a "pyscho." This may be true. What is also true is that the ex-wife of the old fuckboy is just a woman who spent years dealing with relentless narcissism, emotional manipulation and cheating, and now believes that the old fuckboy is evil and must be exterminated. The old fuck boy, having had decades of practice, is adept at gaslighting. Emotionally, he is a 7 year old. He is incapable of having adult conversations about relationships, yet insists he's the best, most affectionate boyfriend. The old fuckboy having spent his 20s and 30s being a born-again asshole, and despite having gone to college, probably has a bullshit job, the income of which goes to child support. He will therefore constantly ask you for money. The old fuckboy can sniff out when you have had enough of his bullshit and will act like a decent human being for 60 seconds in order to stay in your good graces. Worst of all, not only can the old fuckboy make you come like gangbusters Every Single Time, he is aware of the relationship between sex and oxytocin, and makes sure he fucks you regularly enough so the feelings of love/trust felt during sex don't dissipate, also known as dickmatizing or dickmatization. Do not make the mistake of thinking you can remain in control and use the old fuckboy for sex. He's a wily old fart and will find a way to turn the tables so that he's using you.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
The small shirts for men looks like an extra small. Other than that I love the shirt.
Got it for a friend! He loved it
Exactly what I expected, thanks!
So cool to quickly be able to turn a trending phrase into wearable art!
I really love it it's me through and through. Thank you. And when I want another shirt made I will be going through you guys.
My niece laughed and loves her custom shirt.

Not only was the product exactly what I expected, I was well informed on the shipping process in a seamless and timely manner!

Happy that this tee is comfy and fits well. I wish the sentence was on the back too.
This looks like a weird design but it looks cool
Another hit!
Great shirt, great service. A big thumbs up👍🏻
I always get so many compliments when I wear this (my favorite) shirt. I have been able to give out my phone number to lots of nice old men and my parents think it's great that I have so many nice mentors grooming me into a nice young boy who is willing to "follow the rules ".
Very comfortable and love the tyoeface
Very nice t-shirt. Fits perfect.
FUCK you urban dictionary.
hehe mine said skibidi
Wore it to school.
Love this shirt so much
Great looking t-shirt. Good quality. Printing looks good.
Good stuff! Although, I do have a sneaking suspicion that this is cursed. You see, whenever i dawn this top-teir, soft, stylish shirt - I proceed to pass out within 46 seconds. The mere act of making contact with the material insues the process of this countdown starting. If I do not quit contact, i will lose conciousness the exact moment the countown hits 0. And when I regain clarity, I find myself in a bathtub - never mine, but a bathtub nevertheless. In the bathtub, there is always various colours of hairdye. I then have to go back home, shirt stained with dye. Very fashionable though! 10/10
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
Size | Length | Width |
---|---|---|
XS | 27" | 16½" |
S | 28" | 18" |
M | 29" | 20" |
L | 30" | 22" |
XL | 31" | 24" |
2XL | 32" | 26" |
3XL | 33" | 28" |
Size | Length | Width |
---|---|---|
XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |