Dave
Dave is a loser. Dave is almost 40 years old and has been unemployed for 20. Dave makes excuses for himself. Dave lives in his girls friends house for free while she goes to work every day. Dave does nothing all day and just before she comes home, he pretends to do the dishes to seem productive. Dave has no money to buy real drugs like a decent person because he’s a jobless loser, so he huffs propane out a grill tank. Dave is no longer allowed to have a grill at his house. Dave is too lazy to go inside the house and use a toilet like a human, so he shits in a bucket in the backyard and leaves it there. Dave has 4 broken down cars in the driveway because he can’t afford to buy one that works. Dave collects garbage. Dave is garbage. Dave feels so bad about being a loser that he verbally assaults his girlfriend to make her feel bad about herself, so she never sees how shitty he actually is. Dave doesn’t realize that she knows. Dave doesn’t have sex with his girlfriend and sleeps on the couch every night instead of in their bed to avoid sex. Dave is confused and outraged when she ends up sleeping with someone else. Dave doesn’t like to shower. Dave doesn’t brush his teeth. Dave really likes McDonald’s - a lot. Dave plays the victim. Dave starts projects and doesn’t finish ANY of them. Dave uses his inheritance to buy model planes instead of helping his girlfriend pay bills. Dave is a useless piece of shit.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
The T-shirt was a birthday gift for my girlfriend and she absolutely loved it.

Happy that this tee is comfy and fits well. I wish the sentence was on the back too.
My wife absolutely loves her new T-shirt.
This looks like a weird design but it looks cool
This T shirt is the best piece of material to have ever graced this Earth. The fine quality fabrics and in depth definition, which is professionally implanted on the back of the shirt, which makes for some very interesting talking points. Thank you Pablo Parmesan.
Absolutely wonderful product! I bought this shirt for my son and he gagged with joy! Mariah Careystmas everyone!
I love it I bought me and my family some
Glad I had utmost FREEDOM OF SPEECH to express in articulate detail what evv it is the fk i was on a rant about that day. I haven't even received my shirt. I just a few moments ago placed the order. That is how pleased 😄 I am. Fk yeah fk yeah. Very empowering experience. My thoughts turned into type, that made some shi# happen. Having freedom of expression was most definitely...one fk ton of fun. A fk ton can be quantified as exuberance an joy beyond expectation. Fk yeah fk yeah. Awesome>>>
Proofread much? She might seem "quite"? Please fix the spelling to "quiet". Can't believe I was considering this purchase...
Damonism T-shirt :+) I found this by accident while surfing through your site. I love this shirt. I bought one and wear it when I feel frisky.
Another hit!
Great shirt, great service. A big thumbs up👍🏻
I always get so many compliments when I wear this (my favorite) shirt. I have been able to give out my phone number to lots of nice old men and my parents think it's great that I have so many nice mentors grooming me into a nice young boy who is willing to "follow the rules ".
Very comfortable and love the tyoeface
Very nice t-shirt. Fits perfect.
FUCK you urban dictionary.

My brother loved the shirt and the dogs name is cum stain
The small shirts for men looks like an extra small. Other than that I love the shirt.
AMAZING I GOT THE HILAARIOUS SHIRT AND LOVE IT MORE THAN ANYTHING!

I absolutely loveeeeeeee my shirt ! Fast shipping too !
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |