Transatlantic Spanertakic
Transatlantic Spanertakic The Outcast âThe moon is bright tonightâ, said the wise mushroom to the unperturbed cripple, âI have been away from my family for too long now and I must return and seek my vengeance, be it with a mallet, or twenty-three Ikea catalogues.â This legendary tale started in the year of 1720b.c and Mustafa the mushroom (agricultures self named âard man) and Cuthbert the cripple (disabled peoples self named âtuna sandwich) had a plan. They would rob Audley Harrison, the local greengrocer and give the peach coloured doubloons to the âhelp the aged mushroom charityâ. This would help fund day trips for the elderly fungi and encourage them to participate more in events in the local community. Cuthbert and Mustafa were dressed in black (the favourite colour of thievesâ, vagabonds and of course the odd ninja) unfortunately for them it was during the day therefore theyâre clothing colour didnât really matter. Mustafa tried the cat flap, it was open âsuspiciousâ he thought, âthe greengrocer doesnât own a cat.â. The two amigos crept inside, making as little noise as possible and sticking to the shadows. Eventually they reached the forbidden fruit (the till) only to be greeted by⌠âNo moneyâ, screamed Cuthbert, âwhat a waste of time/effort that was, Iâve just missed the bingoâ They snuck outside into the dimly lit street. All of a sudden four armoured tricycles pulled up by the kerb and surrounded the two mushrooms, they were trapped like a farmer in a dinosaur, and they did not know what by⌠The two friends could not remember one thing more about that fateful night and could only recall waking up in the forest surrounded by packs of bacon and âtradeâ size tubs of nutella sandwich spread. We join them at this point⌠âThe moon is bright tonightâ, said the wise mushroom to the cripple, âI have been away from my family for too long now and I must return and seek my vengeanceâŚ, be it with a mallet, or twenty-three Ikea catalogues.â The gruesome twosome decided to head north, not knowing which way was north due to them not having a compass, they headed left. They did not know where it would lead them but they both agreed that anywhere would be better than this bacon and nutella infested dumping ground deep inside the gloomy forest. Little did they know there was a road running parallel to the woodland on the right hand side. They travelled four days and four nights before finally finding a cave in which to rest without disturbance. They lay down ready for a good nights sleep. âArghâ, the noise bellowing from within the cave was shrill and unearthly. Mustafa awoke with a start, and realised the noise was not coming from his mouth. Meanwhile Cuthbert had awoken and realised the noise was coming from his mouth. Not only was the noise coming from the cripple, but he had no arms. âWhere have your arms gone Cuthbertâ, enquired the perplexed mushroom. âI do not know one minute they were there then I woke up this morning and they had disappearedâ, replied the distraught cripple. âAh that will have been the mysterious arm stealing cave dwelling baguette shaped pencil case that many refer to as Johnâ. The cripple was impressed at the mushrooms wisdom and soon forgot about his lack of arms. The two headed off and vowed never to set foot in a cave again. âMUUUUURGHâ, the noise startled the cripple but the wise mushroom proclaimed âitâs just a foghorn, it wonât bite, and we must be near waterâ. And indeed they were, the two comrades had travelled from the murky depths of the woods and had now arrived at the port. There was something suspicious about his port, it was not instantly recognisable but after seven point four (7.4) minutes of intense debate the two terriers agreed that there was in fact no water for miles around. âSo how are the boats thereâ, asked the cripple in complete and utter confusion. âI do not knowâ, replied the mushroom, âwhy donât we go up to a boat and ask him.â So the two walked over to an ocean liner and asked it âhow can you be here if there is no water for miles around.â âI do not knowâ replied the ocean liner.â Utterly satisfied with their answer the two musketeers grabbed the nearest pigs and rode off into the sun⌠âAAAAAAAH, I didnât know it would be so hot up hereâ. For once the cripple had shown himself to be wiser than the mushroom as he had packed his sun proof flairs. Luckily for Mustafa he had spare pair that were just the right size for the now toasted mushroom. They stayed on the moon for a couple of hours, visiting the various souvenir shops, theme parks, and fast food joints before returning home⌠âCRASHâ âI wish these pigs had brakesâ, Mustafa proclaimed, but the cripple was nowhere to be seen. We can only assume he had not landed. BANG! BANG! BANG! Out of nowhere came John Bon Jovi who ate Mustafa in one swallow. SO remember if you are ever in space look out for a cripple and the next time you see John Bon Jovi remember what he done to our hero. Till death do us partâŚ? By Martin Gannon
The Urban Dictionary Hoodie
Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.
Shit
SUPER SIGMA. I LOVE IT.
TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!
Question⌠does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!
bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ÂżPuedo conseguir tu nĂşmero?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm
made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!
It was softer than expected! Great fit for me, I love the way it wears. It is my favorite sweatshirt
Very expensive for just a word on a sweatshirt, but my son was thrilled with it.
I kinda liked it.
Would be South better to have the definition on it as well like we used to be able to customize tshirts, sweats or mugs especially at the higher pricesâŚ
Size adult medium unisex was a perfect fit. Shirt was very soft. Could be a bit thicker for the price.
wrote shart and wore it to a party
i said shart and wore it to a party
Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public

I LOVE THIS HOODIE!! Itâs very comfortable, the writing seems like itâll last for more than a few washes. Something to consider is embroidery! Thatâll make your products stand out from just a regular hoodie with printings. Worth every dollar.
Absolutely brilliant my Argentinian son wi be very pleased
My boy like the hooded attire.
Navy Quality Goods Awesome! My girlfriend Becca loves it!
Navy Quality Goods I bought this shirt to wear whilst i sail the seven seas with my sea cadet friends, i really like the design because i can walk around and everyone knows im a wannabe pirate. I also like the colour choice, i am able to use it as my stealth suit whilst we do our practice drills with spray painted nerf guns :) would buy again!
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Size Chart
Size | Length | Width | Sleeve |
---|---|---|---|
S | 27" | 20" | 33½" |
M | 28" | 22" | 34½" |
L | 29" | 24" | 35½" |
XL | 30" | 26" | 36½" |
2XL | 31" | 28" | 37½" |
3XL | 32" | 30" | 38½" |
Size | Length | Width | Sleeve |
---|---|---|---|
S | 69 cm | 51 cm | 85 cm |
M | 71 cm | 56 cm | 88 cm |
L | 74 cm | 61 cm | 90 cm |
XL | 76 cm | 66 cm | 93 cm |
2XL | 79 cm | 71 cm | 95 cm |
3XL | 81 cm | 76 cm | 98 cm |