ShartCon Hoodie
ShartCon is a condition that is much like the DEFCON system used by the Department of Defense. A ShartCon Alert is declared for a variety of reasons, including but not limited to: Abdominal pain combined with mild nausea and vile gurgling from the stomach. The 24-48 hours following a drinking binge. During flu-like symptoms, as well as while on some antibiotics. For at least 4 hours immediately following a confirmed assblast. When a ShartCon Alert is declared, a severity level is assigned in descending order of severity from 5 to 1. (A 5 is technically a "Shart Watch" level) Each individual varies as to what level they are at under the given symptoms and circumstances, as well as the procedures for increasing or decreasing their ShartCon Levels. Criteria that are universal while in ShartCon levels 4 through 2 include the golden rule: One must ALWAYS test fart. Remember the tried and true phrase "Don't want to Shart? TEST FART!". The lower the level, the more cautious the test fart. While under ShartCon 2, one must stay within striking distance of acceptable sit-down toilet facilities. ShartCon 1, the most sever level, requires a strict adherence to the following: You must remain in sphincter-lock until condition improves to at least FartCon 2. This means no test farts of any kind. You must stay within 30 feet of OPEN toilet facilities. If you must sleep in FartCon 1, you must make the necessary bed preparations (towels, wearing multiple pairs of expendable pants garments, etc). Once you've successfully passed a non-Shart on the toilet, you may choose at that time to downgrade to SC 2. BEWARE of the Fart & Sweat as this can lull you into a false sense of confidence and cause you to tragically downgrade while still very much at risk.
The Urban Dictionary Hoodie
Customer Reviews
why I can't believe that I found it. A diamond in the dust. a needle in the haystack. A Chankla hoodie. no seriously I just bought a hoodie that only said Chankla. Best purchase btw
Pretty good It isn’t very hot and sweaty but other than that it is pretty good
TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!
Better then Gucci and LV I bought 3 of these and omg I’m done it’s literally the best hoodie I have ever worn.Its so good that I think the hoodie give me powers like Shaggy.I hope this becomes better than any other brand that’s how good it is.
Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.
Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public
Question… does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!
bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ¿Puedo conseguir tu número?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm
made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!
It was softer than expected! Great fit for me, I love the way it wears. It is my favorite sweatshirt
Size adult medium unisex was a perfect fit. Shirt was very soft. Could be a bit thicker for the price.
Very expensive for just a word on a sweatshirt, but my son was thrilled with it.
I kinda liked it.
Excellent It's the best only that accessibility to my home town Kampala Uganda seems to be honestly had.I just wish.I would get also things like Mugs,T shirts ,Personelised pens.Different colours.
Quality This is the highest quality product
Just amazing I started browsing on the urban dictionary for the best most exquisite word I could find. And lo and behold I found this! This word, or words fit so perfectly on the sweatshirt it to like it was made to be. The comfy and soft material truly hugs your body and makes you not want to get up Or do anything. 10/10
I LOVE THIS HOODIE!! It’s very comfortable, the writing seems like it’ll last for more than a few washes. Something to consider is embroidery! That’ll make your products stand out from just a regular hoodie with printings. Worth every dollar.
Mr Tulppo Is next This hoodie is my favorite article of clothing
Would be South better to have the definition on it as well like we used to be able to customize tshirts, sweats or mugs especially at the higher prices…
Absolutely brilliant my Argentinian son wi be very pleased