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Manitoba Monkey Wrench Hoodie

Of course Manitoba is essentially the French Dakota. And everyone knows that the Dakotas are home to some of the most sexually depraved humans this side of Bixby. Armed with that as background information, the Manitoba Monkey Wrench is the utensil that is found in every man’s tackle box, toolbox and utility belt. It is the very tool that can keep you alive on those subarctic nights in the local pub. Now might be a good time for an illustrative story. Once there was a logger that frequented the long and lonesome roads between Winnipeg and Dauphin. While he has no doubt dipped his quill into the ink of every truck stop, rest stop and out-house prostitute on those roads, he does have taste. He knows that if a bawdy-house floozy has a large knot on the side of her head from contact with a swiftly exerted monkey wrench to the cranium of a Canuck slut, she is a price catch. This mandible indention is a bade of honor among the native hootch peddlers. He would not only pay her for her wares but also throw in a hearty salmon biscuit sammich with round bacon. They might also ice-skate on the frozen lakes (weather permitting) and rarely, but occasionally he might give her a handshake and a heart-felt “good job”. Back to the definition… The Manitoba Monkey Wrench is to the Maple Leaf Madam as a hickey from Kenickie is to Rizzo. It’s not only something to cherish but to be worn with pride. The Kicker: As with everything, sometimes the giver of the Manitoba Monkey Wrench can go overboard and hit the harlot too hard, those rendering her oral sexual skills as a thing of the past. Once this happens, the harlot becomes a short-order cook and invariably becomes a victim of Meth use. Thirdly: If you’re lucky enough to encounter a lady of the night that is not only skilled in the arts of crushing her own pride but also knows how what the difference between a neutral-zone trap and a one-man fore check then by all means brand the woman as a madam worthy of Manitoba’s highest honor.

Mug Tee
Size guide
2XL L M S XL

The Urban Dictionary Hoodie

Soft and cozy blend
Printed on-demand just for you
Drawstring hood
Front pouch pocket
Ribbed cuffs and waistband
Design on front, blank back
Every order personally reviewed

Customer Reviews

23
5
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0
0

i said shart and wore it to a party

i dont e. Jul 4

wrote shart and wore it to a party

tyler j. Jul 4

SUPER SIGMA. I LOVE IT.

Kai C. Jul 1

why I can't believe that I found it. A diamond in the dust. a needle in the haystack. A Chankla hoodie. no seriously I just bought a hoodie that only said Chankla. Best purchase btw

Why May 21

Pretty good It isn’t very hot and sweaty but other than that it is pretty good

Gillian Apr 23

TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!

smiggen s. Mar 10

Better then Gucci and LV I bought 3 of these and omg I’m done it’s literally the best hoodie I have ever worn.Its so good that I think the hoodie give me powers like Shaggy.I hope this becomes better than any other brand that’s how good it is.

Harold Mar 5

Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.

Marcus D M. Mar 4
✓ Verified Purchase

Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public

Katrina S. Mar 3

Question… does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!

Maddi M. Feb 27

bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ¿Puedo conseguir tu número?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm

Dogsta G. Feb 26

made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!

kai h. Feb 16

It was softer than expected! Great fit for me, I love the way it wears. It is my favorite sweatshirt

Craig C. Feb 11
✓ Verified Purchase

Size adult medium unisex was a perfect fit. Shirt was very soft. Could be a bit thicker for the price.

Art N. Feb 2
✓ Verified Purchase

Very expensive for just a word on a sweatshirt, but my son was thrilled with it.

Christen M. Jan 20
✓ Verified Purchase

I kinda liked it.

Lil M. Jan 3

Excellent It's the best only that accessibility to my home town Kampala Uganda seems to be honestly had.I just wish.I would get also things like Mugs,T shirts ,Personelised pens.Different colours.

Niwomugisha Chevonne Dec 16

Quality This is the highest quality product

Bundai Dec 4

Just amazing I started browsing on the urban dictionary for the best most exquisite word I could find. And lo and behold I found this! This word, or words fit so perfectly on the sweatshirt it to like it was made to be. The comfy and soft material truly hugs your body and makes you not want to get up Or do anything. 10/10

Owen Nov 30
Review by Ahmed E.

I LOVE THIS HOODIE!! It’s very comfortable, the writing seems like it’ll last for more than a few washes. Something to consider is embroidery! That’ll make your products stand out from just a regular hoodie with printings. Worth every dollar.

Ahmed E. Nov 16
✓ Verified Purchase
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