America's History hoodie

A sexual act that requires great finesse and patriotism. It is between a man and a woman, starting with foreplay, representing the founding of Jamestown. This will lead to the arrival of Pilgrims who celebrate the first Thanksgiving, symbolized through the man feasting on the woman's vagina. The man will then "cross the Delaware" by switching from her vagina to her anus, representing the War for Independence. Next is the signing of the Declaration of Independence, signed by John Handcock and fifty-five others. The woman will give the man a hand job, or a blowjob depending on preference. Next the settlement of the West, bringing cowboys and gold mining to America. This is symbolized through the cowgirl/reverse cowgirl position. After this would be the Civil War, in which the couple will engage in doggy style, vaginal for the North and anal for the South. Next is the the Prohibition Act, which is represented by the couple drinking a variety of alcohol, potentially from the oral, naval, or anal cavities. Following would be the baby boom, post-WWII, represented by the most popular sex position, missionary. This leads to America putting the first man on the moon in 1969, which will require the couple to engage in the sixty-nine position. This will end with the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991, leaving America as the only superpower in the world, symbolized by the man ejaculating onto the woman's face - a sign of dominance.

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The Urban Dictionary Hoodie

  • Soft midweight fleece with a brushed interior
  • Comfortable, classic unisex fit
  • Double-lined drawstring hood
  • Front pouch pocket
  • Gildan Heavy Blend
  • Every order personally reviewed
  • Returns & defect-free guarantee

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Customer Reviews

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Navy Quality Goods Awesome! My girlfriend Becca loves it!

Alex Sadler Sep 24

Navy Quality Goods I bought this shirt to wear whilst i sail the seven seas with my sea cadet friends, i really like the design because i can walk around and everyone knows im a wannabe pirate. I also like the colour choice, i am able to use it as my stealth suit whilst we do our practice drills with spray painted nerf guns :) would buy again!

Alex Sadler Sep 24

Nice It's pretty good to describe my mood around my parents!! Love this! Make more!

Lol Sep 14

Shit

Kakkakajs Aug 27

i said shart and wore it to a party

i dont e. Jul 4

wrote shart and wore it to a party

tyler j. Jul 4

SUPER SIGMA. I LOVE IT.

Kai C. Jul 1

why I can't believe that I found it. A diamond in the dust. a needle in the haystack. A Chankla hoodie. no seriously I just bought a hoodie that only said Chankla. Best purchase btw

Why May 21

Pretty good It isn’t very hot and sweaty but other than that it is pretty good

Gillian Apr 23

TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!

smiggen s. Mar 10

Better then Gucci and LV I bought 3 of these and omg I’m done it’s literally the best hoodie I have ever worn.Its so good that I think the hoodie give me powers like Shaggy.I hope this becomes better than any other brand that’s how good it is.

Harold Mar 5

Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.

Marcus D M. Mar 4
✓ Verified Purchase

Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public

Katrina S. Mar 3

Question… does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!

Maddi M. Feb 27

bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ¿Puedo conseguir tu número?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm

Dogsta G. Feb 26

made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!

kai h. Feb 16

It was softer than expected! Great fit for me, I love the way it wears. It is my favorite sweatshirt

Craig C. Feb 11
✓ Verified Purchase

Size adult medium unisex was a perfect fit. Shirt was very soft. Could be a bit thicker for the price.

Art N. Feb 2
✓ Verified Purchase

Very expensive for just a word on a sweatshirt, but my son was thrilled with it.

Christen M. Jan 20
✓ Verified Purchase

I kinda liked it.

Lil M. Jan 3
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