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welcome to keyport, home of the red raider, and the town of wonder and joy. sorta. this town is one square mile, and full of fun perhaps you would like a tattoo from one of the various tattoo parlors, fat kat or taboo, your preferance. did you stop by for some clams, which used to be one of our main exports? or perhaps a football game, we'll probably win it! the people- uppers: friendly, caring, loyal to their town, have a family like quality, tend to have a good knowledge of high school football stats. Everybody knows everybody. downers: not the smartest, sometimes too loyal, a little racist, everybody knows everybody. the school system- uppers: small, you can be the big fish in the little pond, tests arent hard, no homework, little bullying, good sports program. you can hang out and get something delicious before and or after school at broadway bagels. the chicken patties at keyport high are famous. however, if you dont want to send your kid to a public school, there is st. joes the catholic elementary school. downers: not a challenge at all, students are lazy, teachers are a little crazy, no ones that smart, most students end up going to brookdale for college, if anywhere. politics- uppers: recently there has been a pretty even split of democrats and republicans. the council members are young and loyal to their town. downers: a little corrupt. eateries:( many of these are establishments, where keyport elders ate, and still eat today, those are marked with an 'e') mikes subs (e), keyport pizza (e), expresso joes, mcdougnaghs, first wok, dunkin donuts, trinity, chicken coupe, sal and ginos, cornucopia, drews bayshore bistro, keyport fishery (e), a hot dog place that changes its name every month, ye cottage in (e), bulkhead (e), debis icecream, broadway bagels, the yellow rose (e), seaport diner (e), dominoes, ihop, the office. for fun: the keyport firemens fair, a townwide celebration with fun, excitement, and self loathing. fantasies, a local strip joint seconds away from keyport highschool, if youre into that. st. joes fair, the lame version of the firemens fair, its sponsored by the catholic elementary school st. joes. sports, such as pop warner football and cheerleading, and K.Y.A.L., the recreational basketball league, and the school sports teams. also, expresso joes, which have local bands playing on certain nights. then there is always fishing,and more recently skateboarding. Keyport also has many other "funtivities" throughout the year, such as the chilli fest, however these are not as established as the others. hangouts: dunkin donuts (for the younger ones), expresso joes (for the sophisticated), Keyport library (for the bored/old/moms), broadway bagels (for the everyones, but only during the school year), cedar st. park (for the kids that need a break from their parents), and the bulkhead (for the first date/ the people who want a delicious dinner from the raritan bay).

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The Urban Dictionary Tee

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Printed on-demand just for you
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Every order personally reviewed
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This T shirt is the best piece of material to have ever graced this Earth. The fine quality fabrics and in depth definition, which is professionally implanted on the back of the shirt, which makes for some very interesting talking points. Thank you Pablo Parmesan.

Peter P. Oct 26

Absolutely wonderful product! I bought this shirt for my son and he gagged with joy! Mariah Careystmas everyone!

Joan D. Oct 25

I love it I bought me and my family some

Kirk J. Oct 20

Glad I had utmost FREEDOM OF SPEECH to express in articulate detail what evv it is the fk i was on a rant about that day. I haven't even received my shirt. I just a few moments ago placed the order. That is how pleased 😄 I am. Fk yeah fk yeah. Very empowering experience. My thoughts turned into type, that made some shi# happen. Having freedom of expression was most definitely...one fk ton of fun. A fk ton can be quantified as exuberance an joy beyond expectation. Fk yeah fk yeah. Awesome>>>

Jamie M. Oct 16

Proofread much? She might seem "quite"? Please fix the spelling to "quiet". Can't believe I was considering this purchase...

cynthia Oct 13

Damonism T-shirt :+) I found this by accident while surfing through your site. I love this shirt. I bought one and wear it when I feel frisky.

Dee Oct 13

Another hit!

John E. Sep 25
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Great shirt, great service. A big thumbs up👍🏻

Beren S. Sep 24
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I always get so many compliments when I wear this (my favorite) shirt. I have been able to give out my phone number to lots of nice old men and my parents think it's great that I have so many nice mentors grooming me into a nice young boy who is willing to "follow the rules ".

Rick S. Sep 11

Very comfortable and love the tyoeface

John E. Sep 5
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Very nice t-shirt. Fits perfect.

Angela J. Sep 2
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FUCK you urban dictionary.

Nah N. Aug 21
Review by Malachy G.

My brother loved the shirt and the dogs name is cum stain

Malachy G. Aug 6
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The small shirts for men looks like an extra small. Other than that I love the shirt.

Dian C. Aug 5
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AMAZING I GOT THE HILAARIOUS SHIRT AND LOVE IT MORE THAN ANYTHING!

scarlett Jul 31
Review by Kristen G.

I absolutely loveeeeeeee my shirt ! Fast shipping too !

Kristen G. Jul 22
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hehe mine said skibidi

alpha g. Jul 22
Review by Fred F.

Feels great love the shitt

Fred F. Jul 3
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Great shirt. Great service. Shopify doesn’t track the shipment accurately though. However, when I reached out to Urban Dictionary customer service, they were able to help me.

Smitha M. Jul 3
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Wore it to school.

Monica L. Jun 28
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B - Width

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Size Chart

Size Length Width
XS27"16½"
S28"18"
M29"20"
L30"22"
XL31"24"
2XL32"26"
3XL33"28"
Size Length Width
XS69 cm42 cm
S71 cm46 cm
M74 cm51 cm
L76 cm56 cm
XL79 cm61 cm
2XL81 cm66 cm
3XL84 cm71 cm

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