Gooning
Gooning is the dark side of the quest for the ultimate orgasm. Most gooners stumble upon the practice accidentally by edging for long periods while searching for the perfect porn scene or image to nut to. Extended edging sessions lead the gooner into trancelike states where they patiently open browser tab after browser tab for hours at a time, skilfully hovering at the brink of climax until the right stimulus is found. Successful gooning expeditions can lead to massive, seizure-like orgasms that leave the gooner barely conscious and bathed in the euphoric after-effects of their nut. Just as the junkie increases dosage to dangerous levels and uses harder and harder substances while chasing the ultimate high, gooners become desensitised to regular pornography and must seek increasingly depraved and disgusting content to trigger that supreme climax. This can lead to the development of paraphilias and, at worst, reliance upon illegal content. Gooners cannot function without actively fantasising about sex and can therefore be identified by their rapey gaze when seeing women in public. If you have ever edged for more than an hour with twenty or more browser windows open, you are at risk of becoming a gooner. Lay off your dick for a while and don't watch porn for a minimum of one week. This will trigger a reset and allow you to blow a load to something other than animal crush porn.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made
Got it for a friend! He loved it
Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.
mine says "ass" on it lol
Good Decent, comfortable by all means
My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day
shirt made me cum
Dick Aww man I love this shirt for eating
people shat on my shirt that said shart and im mad they took a shit on it instead of a shart
Necero's shirt i can use this in almost every phrase. This shirt allows me to do some great stuff with my kids and grandkids! i'd love for anyone who says same to get this shirt!
Bad! Why is this T-shirt named shitty fucking??What a bad name it is!Recommend?Never!😡
The shirts are amazing! I will be ordering again. And recommend them to others 🙂
My UD shirts are my favorites. They fit well, last long, and are unique. I always have people reading my back.
Amazing This shirt is SOOOOO comfortable and I love the definition
BEST SHIRT OF ALL TIME THIS IS THE BEST SHIRT OF ALL TIME. LITERAL FUCKING HELL OF A PLACE HAS BECOME A PART OF MY EVERDAY VOCABULARY AND I RECOMMEND IT FOR ANYONE WHO IS FORCED TO SIT IN A PLACE THEY HATE FOR AN HOUR EVERDAY. GO BUY THE MUG, SHIRT, OR SWEATSHIRT NOW!
Awesome tshirt This tshirt is awesome but my name isn't actually Jayson but i bought it for his b-day
good is it very. i like shirt much,,,,, it contabfortable like it i do.
The Fucklix t shirt is perfect but I am still waiting for the xlarge I ordered. These are gifts and will be just what is needed. Hope I receive the xlarge soon then it's time to give them to the people I ordered them for. So glad I saw them . Thanks.
My wife loves it. Nice quality and so funny for the wearer. Thank you!
The shirt fit amazing, package was shipped rather fast! Thank you so much..
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |