Carved Blumkin- [a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp. prison lexicon]
Carved Blumkin- a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp. prison lexicon- a festive sex act perpetrated upon new inmates upon their being processed into central lock up and the main prison population in American Prisons- usually occasioned on but not exclusive to Halloween. Turning a new inmate into a "carved blumkin" usually involves his person being purchased as a "wife" (read: "bitch"), in exchange for cigarettes or other such bartered items- as opposed to his merely remaining another bartered item himself (read "everybody's fuck). The act of "carving a blumkin" is therefore both a marital and Hallows Eve ceremonial process of incarceration. The celebration begins with general crotch grabbing by the guests, bachelor, and best men. This is followed immediately by smuggled spoons percussed against the bars, (a clever substitution for wedding bells), calling all to the the altar (read: commode) for the fraternal ritual defecation- followed thereupon with more spoons beating upon the bars, prompting the bachelor to carry his unsuspecting object of adoration directly to his bunk in an act of non consensual conjugal sex (read rape), as a rite of dysfunctional sexual passage... in more ways than one (read: anally). The beating of spoons on bars during the "carving of the blumkin" is the origin for many of our traditions on the outside, such as ringing spoons upon glasses to make the bride and groom kiss upon command.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
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Wore it to school.
Love this shirt so much
I love this t-shirt that says morbussy. It allows me to show off both my love for Morbius and the fact that I get no Morbussy.
This shirt feels great, perfect fit too.
Great looking t-shirt. Good quality. Printing looks good.
Cool I didn’t order anything I just have a lot of free time and not a lot of hobbies
Fun and soft.
Good stuff! Although, I do have a sneaking suspicion that this is cursed. You see, whenever i dawn this top-teir, soft, stylish shirt - I proceed to pass out within 46 seconds. The mere act of making contact with the material insues the process of this countdown starting. If I do not quit contact, i will lose conciousness the exact moment the countown hits 0. And when I regain clarity, I find myself in a bathtub - never mine, but a bathtub nevertheless. In the bathtub, there is always various colours of hairdye. I then have to go back home, shirt stained with dye. Very fashionable though! 10/10
Smooth transaction and nice product, shipping was quick!
good very good worth money!
5 out of 5 I love when people start reading the definition. It's halourious
10/10 yes much good 10/10 would buy again
Fit is true to size, good quality material. Graphics applied well (not off-center or angled as with some products). Quick shipment.
gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made
Got it for a friend! He loved it
Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.
mine says "ass" on it lol
Good Decent, comfortable by all means
My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day
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Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |