Kavian Mug
In ancient times, the Spartans would judge babies to determine whether they were worthy of living. The unfit ones were tossed off a mountain and killed. While this method of selection seems cruel in today's society, there is one person who the world would do well to get rid of. Although he calls himself Kavian The Great, the only thing "great" is his lack of intelligence. In World War II, he assisted the French in fighting the Germans...the French. Once the Germans took over, he begged for salvation, and after multiple "services rendered" to German officers, he was allowed to survive. He was mistaken for a Jew in 1943, due to his horrific physical features, and lived in Auschwitz for a year and a half, until the Allies liberated it. They found him crying in a corner as the other Jews ridiculed him; even in their eyes he was unequal. After the war, he became a fashion designer until US army drafted him as a nurse into Vietnam. Although he bragged about his involvement in the war when he returned, he in fact did horse shit for the US army. When his medical services were called upon, he ran off screaming, "Fuck this shit! I'm joining the Japs!" He changed his name to Jamarcus Jamal when he returned to the US in an attempt to start a new life as a brother from the hood. He suffered multiple injuries in 1985 when he referred to two black men as his "niggas." After that incident, he decided to pursue a hopeless career in computer technology. He now lives with his mother in Georgia.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
I've had this mug for over a year now and every single day it watches while I shower. It makes me safe sometimes protects me from the voices. Other times I'm lying on the couch watching judge Judy and eating my hot pickles and the mug becomes angry I feel it approaching me with menacing aura. Next thing I know I'm pooing out pieces of ceramic. Overall, its a great mug but only if you can afford multiple colonoscopy's and extremely invasive anal procedures a year. If you have the money for that THIS IS THE MUG FOR YOU.
This mug has given me a new meaning to wake up everyday. I absolutely adore it and I don’t think my life would be the same if this mug did not exist. A gift from God, truly.
What a sexy ass mug ヾ(*’O’*)/
My daughter is a Seinfeld afficianato. She was pleasantly surprised when she opened the package with her Penske File mug. It has the definition of Penske File from the Urban dictionary. Totally worth the price!
gay mug very spicy
The Urban Dictionary is a unique place to find anecdotal memories on all sorts of stuff. Their ongoing communication once your order is placed is excellent. I have put in a significant number of orders recently, and the communication regarding my order status is excellent. I have had one order misplaced in transit. They have contacted me to say that they will get back to me, but to this point, they have not. So, that's a bit of a caveat in my rating. Overall, I would rate their products and customer service as good. I would not hesitate to deal with them in the future. Fill Your Boots with Whatever You Want to Order. Nice job, "Urban Dictionary."
Thank you for sharing this Unique piece of Artwork. You are the only one that offered this. Thank you for the quality service you have provided not only in what you offer but right on to the quality packaging as well. Thanks again - Peggy Hall
My brother Tom became an uncle & urban dictionary created a wonderful uncle Tom mug…
It is special to have a mug that has to do with my dad who invented a word when we were growing up. He passed away last year. Drinking from this mug is like spending time with him.
Quick turnaround time and good quality merchandise.
very cool kanye for me gave it to my crush and now were dating so yea
I bought a Prone mug and i love it its so good imma prone to the bathroom now brb
This mug gives my life purpose. It's what I've always said. Patience is a virtue and hard work never betrays. Ever since I was born I've been struck with one misfortune after another, but today it all paid off. I got my own mug, and I use it anywhere and whenever I can! Both of my legs are shattered because to my wife threw me in the middle of traffic and my windpipe is messed up due to me screaming all the way from the crash site to the hospital thanks to the unbearable pain I was feeling. Although even with all that's happened this is still the best day of my life. I suppose the only problem I have is that whenever I happen to look at my cup I get a little too happy. That causes problems because my life support can't handle my exhilaration, haha! I'm just kidding; that was just a little lighthearted joke of mine. I actually cannot afford life support because I spent all of my life savings on this fine piece of pottery. Not to worry though! I can get through the pain with my will and drugs - I mean medication. P.S. There are definitely no ghosts in the mugs. Just wanted to point that out in case someone was worried about that.
I bought two mugs as gifts for coworkers and they were very pleased. The print was clear and concise. Hopefully they last a long time.
Ordered a gift for a friend I hope he likes it :)
Mug was well-packed when received. Shipping was timely. The mug was as advertised. Very nice.
BEST THING EVER. CUZ YK WHAT!!?!? IT. IS. A. MUG. WITH MY NAME. AND. A COOL DESCRIPTION. ON. IT. I LOVE IT.
Just what I expected! Thank you!
I bought this friggin thing thinking my whole life would change. Guess what? It still sucks! If this friggin thing can't change my life then I don't want it!
This is a great gift to give after our Urban Dictionary inclusion