The Suttonator
A machine, patented by The English Department Ltd, and designed purely to be possibly the most anti-social and hated contraption ever created. It contains 8 million anal transistors and just under 6 million bitch capacitors. The quirky designers implemented a function in the machine to make it teach English, and with that constantly brag about the degree it got at Oxford University; however they did not program it to mention that it was Oxford Brookes. The Suttonator has many pre-programmed voice commands and jingles; predominantly 'stop masticating', 'spit or swallow please' and the term 'Spankage'. Everything else it emits from its 380 Watt mouth is just indistinguishable shouting and screaming. The machine is designed to hate and be spiteful to everyone it encounters, but a small bug in the software makes it particularly fond of just a few students it teaches. It favours them above the rest of the class and showers them with praise and prizes. We still do not know today how this behaviour is formed, but it is suspected it has something to do with good behaviour in class. The design of The Suttonator is far from original. It is clearly closely inspired and almost an exact pastiche of Miss Sutton, the English Teacher. The only difference being that the machine cannot lactate; although there is no evidence that the human can either. Like 'Miss Sutton', The Suttonator has weaknesses: It hates to be humiliated in front of an audience and particularly dislikes people who are irritatingly cheerful. If you are subject of this, then you may be asked to 'stay behind after class'; a cheap but effective ploy in eliminating the perpetrator. No machine is without disadvantages, and The Suttonator has a severe problem with agility. Due to it's obscene weight and wide-birth extremities, it's top speed is 0.36 km/h, and has trouble fitting through doorways that it immediately claims have shrunk. Always dressed in a green coat, this machine closely resembles a concorde pear, with it's very wide hips, narrowing towards towards the head.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Was quality and delivered quick our friend loved it!
Quality and style are outstanding relative to price point.
Quick delivery, easy ordering, unique and special gift!
My coach loves it. I gave this to my coach and she was over the moon. Ever been hugged by an Olympic gold medalist?
Perfect cuup of coffee size, and the printing is spot on!
Arrived speedily and exactly as pictured.
I LOVE GETTING THE FUCKING MUG
The wife absolutely loved it for her birthday
it was the best and it was so worth the 10000000000 dollars
Can we really send one to Trump? That's where mine is going. Anyone who gets it will see it as a compliment, I'm sure. Love my mug and love that new "urban dictionary" term: Celebritrash. It'll be in the mainstream dictionaries next week.
My friend saw the message on the cup ordered at a mutual friends house. We think it’s hilarious so had to put it on a coffee cup. Funny, great Christmas present. If she can’t use in public she can always use at home for pens and pencils on her desk!
Bought the "Bump Down" mug for my boyfriend, he thought it was the greatest and couldn't believe I'd actually found something with the phrase on it!
Great mug but i can't manage to get it out of my asshole again
First heard the term “Cheddar Headed” from the song Feel Good by the Gorillaz. Had to look it up and found the definition hilarious and at times very true! So......had to have it! Took it to work and it definitely made an impression. Hahaha!
This was purchased as a gift , and it describes the recipient perfectly . It arrived sooner than expected, and I am very impressed with the quality .
The mug I ordered was exactly as described on the site. The shipping was fast as well. I will buy from these people again.
Cute mug, arrived promptly in great condition. I like how you can choose background color & change wording. Will feel cheerful when drinking my coffee in this :)
Heavenly Mug This mug has been sent from the heavens. I'm too broke to buy it. But one day... I will. I will be mugged, dammit!
Why am I here? I don't know how I got here, but I can't stop writing weird things on the cup...😅 Help me. I have a test to study for. A family. Also, if I wasn't broke I would buy 10,000 of these mugs. They look highly entertaining. Love this website, and I probably will fail the test. 🙃
I took time designing it but wasn't sure, online tools being what they are, that what I was seeing was for sure what I'd get. Very much appreciated the customer service communication which verified that what I'd designed was what I wanted, and the shipping was quick too.
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