Shetective Mug
1.noun - Shee-tek-tiv Women who waste time investigating things they already know the answers to. Instead of using known facts to make a decision, the investigation of the situations is more important. Sometimes leaving Shetectives in terrible relationships for months or years while they conduct their investigations. Shetectives use investigative methods that they feel are ok because they are women, but would feel those methods are controlling or abusive if used by men. Shetective investigate methods include but are not limited to: ~Waiting for time alone with your phone so that she can go through all contacts, texts, pictures and calls. ~Not knowing how to do anything on a computer but search your browser history. ~Revisiting old questions and conversations by pretending you have not discussed them to see if your answers were the same as last time. ~Manipulating you into checking your voicemail from a phone that captures all numbers keyed into it. Even the ones after the actual phone number. These extra numbers will contain your voicemail pin which she will identify and use to listen to your voicemail later or when you are asleep.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
The snarky message on the mug always gets big laughs from guests so I'm now using it as my go-to bourbon glass
Love the coffee mug. Would have been nice to see who had the word accepted into Urban Dictionary printed on the bottom of the mug. As I was the one. "Dusty Dawg" Other than that I love.
fuck ur mugs i want one for free
This mug, much like a cursed relic unearthed from the depths of despair, embodies a cacophony of design flaws and manufacturing mishaps that make one wonder if it was birthed from the darkest corners of incompetence itself. From its deceptively promising exterior, which boasts a color scheme akin to a bruised banana left out in the sun for too long, to its handle that feels more like a medieval torture device designed to punish the unsuspecting hand that dares to grasp it, every aspect of this mug screams "regret." Its material, a sinister amalgamation of recycled nightmares and shattered dreams, leeches a flavor reminiscent of stale coffee mixed with the tears of disappointed souls into whatever liquid unfortunate enough to be poured within its cursed confines. The rim, jagged and uneven like the edge of a poorly forged blade, guarantees that each sip is a perilous journey fraught with the risk of lip lacerations and existential dread. And let us not forget the bottom of this vessel, where the manufacturer's logo is stamped with all the subtlety of a scarlet letter, branding the user as a victim of their own poor purchasing decisions for all eternity. Indeed, this mug serves as a stark reminder that sometimes, in the vast expanse of consumer goods, there exists a dark abyss where quality and utility fear to tread, leaving only disappointment and regret in their wake.
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