Kal-El Mug
The Last Son of Krypton, a former planet where evolution has, by total coincidence, produced a species identical to humans except for their larger muscles and more handsome features. Krypton was destroyed in a remarkably splendid explosion when Kal-El was just an infant. The explanations for this explosion vary, but none of them make sense. Fortunately, Kal-El's father, Jor-El just happened to have recently invented a small spacecraft, just large enough for an infant. Little Kal was placed into the craft and sent it into space, mere moments before the explosion! The child safely reached Earth, and landed outside of the town of Smallville, Kansas, U.S.A. where he was raised by Jonathan and Martha Clark, who quickly decided to take him and claim he was their baby. Somehow, Kal-El's Kryptonian physiology reacted to the light of Earth's yellow sun and gave him almost every superpower that one can think of, and he uses these powers for protecting the people of Earth while wearing a brightly-colored costume, which has given him fame across the universe. There are only 3 things to which Kal-El is vulnerable: 1) radioactive chunks of his home planet, of which there are many on Earth, which only affect a Kryptonian and cause no harm to Earthlings. 2) A direct hit from an atomic bomb. and 3) magic. On top of his job of protecting Earth (and often other worlds), he also manages to be a successful reporter for the Metropolis Daily Planet. Virtually nobody has ever caught on that the reporter and the superhero are the same person, because Kal-El wears fake glasses when he's reporting, and he doesn't wear glasses when he's heroing. Other names that Kal-El is known by include Clark Kent and Superman. He also has several nicknames, including The Metropolis Marvel, The Man of Steel (a title he stole from Steel Sterling), and Earth's Mightiest Mortal (a title he stole from Captain Marvel). I do not know anything about his penile girth or Emcee skills, although I'm sure they're impressive.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
Cool
I got this for my dad but he didn’t want it so he just gave it to me. Ever since I took it back my life has been the greatest it’s ever been. I asked my other dad if he wanted but he said no too. Oh well, I get to enjoy this product for myself more.
It was the greatest mug I've ever ordered :skullll
This mug has made me so happy. This is more than I could have ever wanted in life.
My friend loved it.!!
I like it, but not a lot. Also, the mugs are overpriced.
i luv it! great quality and actually the same hight as mossoflife!
Loved it, my co-workers liked the mug.
best mug every i get to wake up every morning to sip out of my sexy lama mug
I really like this mug. It’s quite bizarre and helps me live a quiet life in my small town of Morioh, Japan.
briliant buy great gift for my grandkid! love it!
This mug saved my life from spiraling down a deep dark path.
Great present for my wife, she uses it all the time, and it's her to a T.
I love it. High quality. Just as I had hoped.
This mug looks great! I love it!
I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother