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Jake Pearson

A gentleman of Chinese origin who was a renowned harlequin during the Prussian Civil War. Well known for his ability to eat metal and divide 9 digit numbers by 7 in his head, he often wore lederhosen and fake fur coats. Born in 1763 in the town of Coffewang, Austria, he spent his early years milking cows, goats and even badgers on a rural farm, joining the circus in 1770 as a juggler. Little is known of the next few years of his life, although by 1784 he was employed as a courthand of King Bendilegs of Latvia. However, due to an unfortunate situation he found himself him with the King's eldest Son (rumour has it they were caught copulating in the Royal Chambers) he was sentenced to be hung as a practicing homosexual (which in that era was a crime punishable by death). The King's son was exiled and travelled to Spain where he took up employment as a minister, but Jake was spared of his fate due to his previous loyalty and ability to amuse the King. He worked from that day on a court jester (harlequin) until his untimely death in 1806 after consuming a tainted slab of marzipan, poisoned by those opposed to the King's proposal to impose a land tax to wealthy landowners that was nearly 3% above the base rate in that region.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed

Customer Reviews

Good quality ceramic cup! Worth the novelty price!

Chuck B. 2021-12-22
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Review by Ethan

Perfect gift for my gf

Ethan 2021-12-22

Looks great! Came quick

Izzy A. 2021-12-22
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Gave it to my nerd brother. He used it consume liquid

Marc T. 2021-12-22
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Review by Nathan S.

Love it

Nathan S. 2021-12-22
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Review by Ana job w.

Too inappropriate

Ana job w. 2021-12-21

epic

deez n. 2021-12-20

Got exactly what I wanted. Very happy with my mug.

Robin C. 2021-12-20
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It came faster than I thought it would and it looks great!

Noah M. 2021-12-20
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i am literally shitting literal bricks please help my asshole is on fire

joe m. 2021-12-20

Looked great, came earlier than expected, and in perfect condition!

Stephen I. 2021-12-20
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Every Aspect of my Order (as First-Time customer) was actually very good, nice. .I ordered a white drinking mug with a Red background with text. would recommend this Site again.

Thomas D. 2021-12-19
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so cool! u can make sarcastic stuff too. i put: sarcasm: being an absolute asshole

TreDavis M. 2021-12-18

The description of a person by their names is the realest I’ve ever come across

Boluwatife 2021-12-16

It was a really good hoe mug!!!!!

Hoe H. 2021-12-15

Exactly what I was hoping for! Great product

Robseth T. 2021-12-14
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Looks great and quick delivery

Brian C. 2021-12-13
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very good quality, wasn’t broken or anything and was a good gag gift !

Aisy M. 2021-12-13
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Review by Chris C.

It was a surprise gift for someone and she absolutely loved it!

Chris C. 2021-12-12
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Imagine not buying one of these. 🤢🗑🤡= non-buyer. Couldn't be me. 😎

Crater H. 2021-12-10

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