Jake Pearson
A gentleman of Chinese origin who was a renowned harlequin during the Prussian Civil War. Well known for his ability to eat metal and divide 9 digit numbers by 7 in his head, he often wore lederhosen and fake fur coats. Born in 1763 in the town of Coffewang, Austria, he spent his early years milking cows, goats and even badgers on a rural farm, joining the circus in 1770 as a juggler. Little is known of the next few years of his life, although by 1784 he was employed as a courthand of King Bendilegs of Latvia. However, due to an unfortunate situation he found himself him with the King's eldest Son (rumour has it they were caught copulating in the Royal Chambers) he was sentenced to be hung as a practicing homosexual (which in that era was a crime punishable by death). The King's son was exiled and travelled to Spain where he took up employment as a minister, but Jake was spared of his fate due to his previous loyalty and ability to amuse the King. He worked from that day on a court jester (harlequin) until his untimely death in 1806 after consuming a tainted slab of marzipan, poisoned by those opposed to the King's proposal to impose a land tax to wealthy landowners that was nearly 3% above the base rate in that region.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews
Good quality ceramic cup! Worth the novelty price!

Perfect gift for my gf
Looks great! Came quick
Gave it to my nerd brother. He used it consume liquid

Love it

Too inappropriate
epic
Got exactly what I wanted. Very happy with my mug.
It came faster than I thought it would and it looks great!
i am literally shitting literal bricks please help my asshole is on fire
Looked great, came earlier than expected, and in perfect condition!
Every Aspect of my Order (as First-Time customer) was actually very good, nice. .I ordered a white drinking mug with a Red background with text. would recommend this Site again.
so cool! u can make sarcastic stuff too. i put: sarcasm: being an absolute asshole
The description of a person by their names is the realest I’ve ever come across
It was a really good hoe mug!!!!!
Exactly what I was hoping for! Great product
Looks great and quick delivery
very good quality, wasn’t broken or anything and was a good gag gift !

It was a surprise gift for someone and she absolutely loved it!
Imagine not buying one of these. 🤢🗑🤡= non-buyer. Couldn't be me. 😎
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