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Gooning

Gooning is the dark side of the quest for the ultimate orgasm. Most gooners stumble upon the practice accidentally by edging for long periods while searching for the perfect porn scene or image to nut to. Extended edging sessions lead the gooner into trancelike states where they patiently open browser tab after browser tab for hours at a time, skilfully hovering at the brink of climax until the right stimulus is found. Successful gooning expeditions can lead to massive, seizure-like orgasms that leave the gooner barely conscious and bathed in the euphoric after-effects of their nut. Just as the junkie increases dosage to dangerous levels and uses harder and harder substances while chasing the ultimate high, gooners become desensitised to regular pornography and must seek increasingly depraved and disgusting content to trigger that supreme climax. This can lead to the development of paraphilias and, at worst, reliance upon illegal content. Gooners cannot function without actively fantasising about sex and can therefore be identified by their rapey gaze when seeing women in public. If you have ever edged for more than an hour with twenty or more browser windows open, you are at risk of becoming a gooner. Lay off your dick for a while and don't watch porn for a minimum of one week. This will trigger a reset and allow you to blow a load to something other than animal crush porn.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed
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Review by Bonnie E.

I have a “gift” for plathering. The definition is right on. Can’t wait to have a cup of coffee across the table from my guy who will TOTALLY get it.

Bonnie E.Nov 27
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dear Jim. B whose 1 star test review is showing up on top: thank you for your service sir

Rick A.Nov 27

These mugs are supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Bob the builder B.Nov 27

Hello, I am here to present if this is a real rating system or not. If you are reading this it's a true rating system. But if this doesn't make it, urban dictionary, I know what you are doing.

Jim B.Nov 26

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