condom
A latex, polyurethane, or natural sheepskin oblong barrier placed over the penis for eliminating most chance of pregnancy for human males who can: 1. Actually fit into the damned things without losing all bloodflow and causing permanent damage. 2. Do not experience an extremely vast, sexually debilitating loss of sensitivity due to the thickness of the material and the lack of circulation. Condoms, among those with penises longer than 190mm or wider than 52mm, are sometimes likened to wrapping a standard rubber band around one's wrist sixteen times and then trying to play a musical instrument, such as a piano or guitar, using that hand, for an hour. Generally, in such a scenario, one's hand will experience first pressure, followed by throbbing pain, succeeded by a piercing pain, ending finally in numb limpness and likely permanent or long-lasting damage to nerve endings or blood vessels. Such individuals generally protest that while condoms are a brilliant invention, they need to be made to accomodate more human proportions, as they are available in two basic sizes: short and fat, or long and narrow. In all latex or polyurethane cases, the elastic band at the base of the condom is always 2" (0.06mm), which is the root of the problem yet does not vary with the width of the shaft and head areas of the condom sizes. The only reasonably sized condoms in these cases are the natural condoms, which are unfortunately made of sheep intestine, and smell like it. Yet this type proves an option preferrable over the absurd designs of the vast repertoire of other condom types.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
My great great great great great uncle’s dog’s daughter’s owner’s sister loved this mug. Must recomend!!!
Got this for my dog
As a Jolology major, I love my new mug!
It was for a friends 70th b-day. When we order it, it was going to come 2 day after the party. But we were so excited it came 3 days before his party. It was a big hit. Thank you.
I gave it as a gift and the recipient loved it. No indication where it was made, so maybe USA? That would be really nice, if so.
I appreciated the email asking if the content was correct. Excellent quality and attention to detail. Thank you!
its an incredible mug! i would recommend purchasing this awesome product!
Damonism and #Stolen Valor Coffee Mug These coffee mugs are rugged, solid, high quality and keep the liquids hotter, longer. The definitions of both mugs are spot-on! I will definitely by more. Great work Urban Dictionary!
why is this a real thing? AND YA'LL ACTING LIKE IT'S NORMAL!?
I really like the mug, but I thought I had ordered the all pink one. What came was a white with a block of pink with "Fubar" written on it.
the only reason why i care about humanity this mug is the reason why i believe humanity deserves a second chance, even after they blaspheme my name. this mug is the greatest thing i've ever seen and i have ordered many of them. this mug replaces the holy grail. the bible should've told about the wonderful deeds of the mug and how it saved humanity from my wrath. alas, whilst the laws keep me from tampering with human minds and altering holy objects like the bible, i can only pass on my message: "spread the news and buy this mug!"
Its.. omg, its............. AMAZING AMAZING OMG ITS SOOO GOOD
A mug for your boyfriend Paul????? My boyfriend is not called Paul. I don't even have a boyfriend
Great mug... finally got my ""your mom gay lol" mug, I'm so happy
ariana grande mug omg this slays mah life
It was easy to correct grammar when necessary, and then to order a great gift for a member of a wedding party. Nice, simple, and sturdy mug.
with this we regain gods trust This mug changes my views of humanity. I think we may have a chance of not going extinct. Everyone should own this fantastic mug. Oh it's also has a nice handle.
Love that I got an Urban Dictionary word definition from someone I know! So much fun and great memory item!! 😊
I like it but it took a long time getting here
Very basic mug but does the trick!
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