Calltech
The most ass outsourcing company in the world. They basically pay you 9 bucks an hour to sit on a phone and be a script monkey while drunk, angry rednecks call to complain that the service sucks because they can't spell their fucking password and/or don't know what a username is. (True story.) Furthermore, half the time, your diagnostic tools are hopelessly broken, and you're forced to "do the best you can." Management is a joke, as most of the time, the managers just hang out in their office or the breakroom, play with numbers, take three-hour lunch breaks, and leave early. They have health and dental packages, but the coverage sucks shit and gets taken out of your paycheck. They don't give sick days, they give sick HOURS, as if you're supposed to recover from the flu in four hours and get back to work. You can't take the day off if you're sick unless you have PERSONAL VACATION TIME to use up. If you stay home with your sick child, you're reprimanded, and if you do it again, you get fired. They also have a ridiculously high turnover rate - people usually quit after a month or so - and they're sometimes forced to put uncertified trainees on the call floor with a script and a prayer. This further exacerbates the first problem, as callers seeking help are frustrated with people that honestly don't know what they're doing, which gives them and the company they outsource for a bad image. If you work the evening shift, your night will basically work like this: 3:30 PM - Come in early to make a good impression on the boss, only to be told that they don't want you in the building more than 15 minutes before your shift, and you are summarily thrown out. 3:45 PM - Come back in and rush for the next 15 minutes and try to find an unoccupied cubicle. Yes, you don't get your own workstation, you have to share one with all the stupid whackbag employees. 4:00 PM - Shift starts. Steady call flow, not too bad. 5:00 PM - Morning shift ends. You get hit with the backlog as there are suddenly too few agents on the floor that know what they're doing and give a shit about the customer. 5:00 PM to 9:30 PM - Trying hopelessly to clear out a massive queue in the call gate. 9:30 PM - Calls finally slow down as customers give up and go to bed. 10:00 PM to 12:00 AM - Boredom sets in. Only a few incoming calls. You see, you're pretty much not allowed to do anything at your desk but twiddle your thumbs when you are available. Oh, wait, that's right, you don't get your own desk. 11:59 PM - Just as you're about to log out for the night, Bubba calls you with some huge, convoluted problem. 12:59 AM - Finally get Bubba off the phone after finding out it's nothing you can help them with anyway, yet they still believe YOU broke their computer and want to cancel their service. As you clock out and head to the door, one of the supervisors bitches you out for spending so long on that last call and staying for an hour of "unapproved overtime." In short, it's a company bound for the shitter. Stay away, stay away...
The Urban Dictionary Mug
I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
Super Funny Mug 😂
best mug ever spittin nothin but fax
i fucking hate your mugs and shirts
awesome product!
This mug made me to from a Level 1 Crook to Level 100 Mafia Boss instantly. I ascended to the heavens above when it came to the door and God himself told me "your a boss now cuh" and i descended feeling very powerful. Next thing I knew everyone loved me. However 4/5 stars because now I have too many fans and one is holding me hostage.... help
The mug is awesome, the yellow color is great but green is also good, the scream mug is the best mug in my entyre live!!! I can't imagine my life without this mug, i cant stop buing it.... I have like 30 mugs every color in this site and also i'm ordered a new one, please help me.
It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy
This mug made me horny.
looks perfect!!! we loved it
I ordered 4 of your mugs -- and have received 3; hopefully, the 4th is on its way! So far, I've received "fame," "620," and "$" ... only needing "hulo." ...It might be a matter of me being patient, that the 4th mug is on its way. However, the 3 received SO far are all EXCEPTIONAL, in every way!!! Mark Moilanen
I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better
it's the best mug of the world !!!!!
wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!
The description tells nothing but facts. 5 stars instant
Your description is right on, except in 1989 I named my daughter Kallen Mikel (www.kallenmikel.com/original-art). I thought I made up the name, but apparently, it originated as a boy's name in Greek and Hebrew. I first found this out in 2001 when I was traveling to Finland. In the 'tube food' section in a big Finnish supermarket there it was, a royal blue tube of salmon paste with a blonde-haired boy named Kallen! So now I have discovered that there are many Kallen's of both sexes. I want to buy her a cup, but it has 'him' on it. Is there any way you can make that a unisex description for both sexes? Just askin'. Being a Barbara (Barbs) myself ... a 'cake eater' from Edina, MN I had to ask ... haha ;-)
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