Umbilical Tetherball
An unconventional method of deciding whether your newborn will have an innie or outie belly button. After the baby is delivered, the doctor asks the mother to stand up in the middle of the room. He gathers his nurses around the mother, and 'serves' the bay like a tennis ball. It differs from conventional tetherball in that the object of the game is not for either team to wrap the ball around the pole (or in our case, the baby around the mother) a certain number of times in their respective direction, but rather to be the one with the hit that induces the breaking of the umbilical cord. Since the purpose of the game is to leave to form of the belly button up to chance, the doctor does not cut the umbilical cord down shorter after it has broken, no matter how long it is. Our lawyers recommend not to play next to windows. While baby's bones are made of cartilage, a high enough velocity can still shatter a window, causing hundreds of dollars in damage. Health care in America is expensive enough as it is; having to pay extra for a delivery in order to compensate for the damages would be a tragedy for a family. (See also: ObamaCare.)
The Urban Dictionary Tee
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Love this shirt. Got it for my brother for Christmas and I can’t wait for his reaction! Ordered size L and it seems maybe a little big? Thank you!
thankyou for all your kind reviews. For everyone complaining about the spelling we was high on the bezamine while writing it so fuck youuuuuu
I love it
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ThIs is perfect
Great quality and fast shipping and I just dropped my mug.
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My niece laughed and loves her custom shirt.
Not only was the product exactly what I expected, I was well informed on the shipping process in a seamless and timely manner!
The T-shirt was a birthday gift for my girlfriend and she absolutely loved it.
Happy that this tee is comfy and fits well. I wish the sentence was on the back too.
My wife absolutely loves her new T-shirt.
This looks like a weird design but it looks cool
This T shirt is the best piece of material to have ever graced this Earth. The fine quality fabrics and in depth definition, which is professionally implanted on the back of the shirt, which makes for some very interesting talking points. Thank you Pablo Parmesan.
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I love it I bought me and my family some
Glad I had utmost FREEDOM OF SPEECH to express in articulate detail what evv it is the fk i was on a rant about that day. I haven't even received my shirt. I just a few moments ago placed the order. That is how pleased 😄 I am. Fk yeah fk yeah. Very empowering experience. My thoughts turned into type, that made some shi# happen. Having freedom of expression was most definitely...one fk ton of fun. A fk ton can be quantified as exuberance an joy beyond expectation. Fk yeah fk yeah. Awesome>>>
Proofread much? She might seem "quite"? Please fix the spelling to "quiet". Can't believe I was considering this purchase...
Damonism T-shirt :+) I found this by accident while surfing through your site. I love this shirt. I bought one and wear it when I feel frisky.
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |