Twatalope

A twatalope is a large, herbivorous mammal native to suburban areas in every major American city. Generally female, the twatalope is typically found crammed into her 16-year-old daughter's clothing (which is always at least two sizes too small), drenched in whatever perfume Oprah most recently gushed about, and yapping away on a cell phone. The twatalope's usual means of conveyance is a Cadillac Escalade, though they have been spotted in less garish vehicles. The twatalope believes itself to be the center of the universe, and will generally become enraged when challenged by anything it perceives as a lesser being, e.g. everyone else. Avoid at all costs unless you are sure nobody will see you kill it.