townie

If you, like me, are lucky enough to live near Middlesbrough you will see more than your fair share of townies: Hopelessly retarded scumbags who, if male, will wear an almost horizonal baseball cap (usually tartan), either some sort of tracksuit top or a Reebok sweatshirt, with Adidas, Reebok, Nike etc. tracksuit bottoms tucked into a pair of scruffy football socks and topped off with a pair of scuffed Ellesse/Adidas/Lacoste trainers. They will be found riding their bikes through the middle of town with about 5 of their mates, listening to "happy hardcore" and/or garage music ;/;/ or sat outside the off license in gangs of ten or more waiting for "our brova" to come out with their bottle of cider. Female townies indulge in similar activities but rather than sporting a (most likely stolen) bike, will have a pram with their bastard child in it. You can recognise them by the incredibly tight ponytails, too much make up and combo of Kappa tracksuit top and leggings/shell suit bottoms, along with their constant cries (and this counts for males as well) of "ere youuu!" Other activities they enjoy are: being knobheads, giving people a hard time for NO reason, calling people moshers because they wear baggy jeans, making normal, respectable people's lives less fun, burning things, stealing things and generally making the world a worse place. Judging by the amount of negative comments on this site it appears that NO-ONE likes them and they would probably all just be better off dead. I hate them, their very existence makes me unhappy, although at least I am safe in the knowledge that I aren't one :).